NANA: Where Would We Be Now?
by saruneko
Summary: Continuation of Nana right after the last episode of season one. Nana/Ren, Hachi/Nobu, Takumi/Reira/Shin.
1. Chapter I: The Show Must Go On

**THE SHOW MUST GO ON**

_**N.B. **__Hey this is my first time posting a story up here. Wanted to create an entire new story actually, but found myself too attached to the character of Nana Osaki to have an original one, so decided to go ahead and continue the story from episode 47 of season one of the anime Nana. Might be doing another fan fic on Harry Potter. I'll let you guys know! Ta._

_P.S. Would love if you gave reviews. If you want me to continue, let me know! Also, all characters are trademarks of __**Viz Media **__and __**Ai Yazawa**__. I did not make them up :) Just making that clear._

_---_

_Hey Nana, would you forgive me? If you knew how I felt? Maybe you would, if you knew the truth… But I think you already know, don't you?_

Nobu held her hand. The diamond ring that circled her finger glinted in the sunlight, and caught his eye. He flinched, remembering Takumi. The man who had married the woman he loved. Outside, he heard Satsuki chatting animatedly away to Yasu and Shin. Nobu remembered that they were not alone.

Nana caught her breath. From the moment Nobu had touched her, a flood of memories had come back, ones she had tried to stuff into a box in her brain, and hide away. She had to keep it in, all those feelings, for the sake of her child, for the sake of her marriage. She too, heard the others' lively conversation outside, of Yasu wondering when Nana was coming, of Shin telling Satsuki that her godparents would be here soon. Nana looked down at Nobu. He looked back at her sadly. Nana looked away again, and said in an undertone, "I'll go get you your towel."

Outside, Shin watched Nana emerge from the bathroom. She headed towards her old room, and shut the door quietly. Shin caught Yasu's eye, and Yasu nodded pointedly at Satsuki, whom had taken the doll Nobu had given her out of its case and walking her around the tabletop.

"Uncle Yasu, is Uncle Ren going to be wearing a yukata too?" She asked, looking up into Yasu's sunglasses. He smiled down at her. Shin laughed and said, "Probably not. He probably doesn't even **have** one! Good thing Hachi brought one for everyone."

"If you think Ren wearing a yukata is funny, try imagining Nana, she'll probably look weirder," Yasu said, while Shin and Satsuki both tilted their heads, trying to imagine. Then they simultaneously burst out laughing.

Inside the room, Nana sat down slowly on her bed. Returning to this apartment, in which she and Nana had once shared, made her feel slightly melancholy. Here she was once innocent and protected, surrounded and accompanied by people she loved, and who loved her. She looked around the room, and saw it just as it was before. Her makeup and perfume bottles on the vanity table; her clothes hanging over the chairs. She glanced at the walls which she had painted over, and remembered that she had done that to help Nana forget the memories of the poster which showed the image of Ren, and Trapnest. Nana's eyes filled up with tears. Here was where her life had begun, and when she had started anew with Nana beside her, comforting her, reassuring her, cheering her on. Remembering Nobu, she hurried to the closet and extracted a towel. She folded it tenderly, and wiped her eyes free from tears. She opened the door slightly, listening to Yasu, Shin and Satsuki laugh. Nana smiled, looked around the room briefly once more and headed outside, closing the door softly behind her.

---

_**N.B. **__Review: )_


	2. Chapter II: Arrival

**ARRIVAL**

"Hey Hachi, what were you doing in there?" Shin asked Nana as she came out.

"Just getting a towel for the young master in the tub," replied Nana laughingly. She hurried over to the toilet and knocked on the door.

"Nobu, I've brought your towel," she said to the door.

"Thanks Hachi," Nobu said, extending his hand through a small slit in the doorway to take the towel. Nana handed him the towel and hurried towards the kitchen, her face an impassive mask of blankness. She began arranging some more food she had brought on to various plates. Satsuki lay in Yasu's lap. Suddenly, she sat up.

"They're coming!" She yelled excitedly, just as Nobu walked out of the bathroom.

"Really? How'd you know?" Nobu asked her. She rushed towards the door and pressed her ear against it.

"Cos I can hear their footsteps!" Satsuki pulled on her mother's sleeve impatiently.

"Now, now, it could be anyone who lived along this corridor," Nana said to her daughter. But she too was excited. It had been a long time since she last saw Nana. Not to mention Ren. In fact, it had been a long time since she had seen any of them at all, since they had been so busy. The Black Stones had hit Tokyo hard, since the release of their album, Lucy. They all heard the footsteps coming closer. Then Satsuki pulled the door open.

"Auntie Nana!" She screamed happily as she ran out the door.

"What's this auntie business?" A voice carried down the corridor into the apartment.

The rest of them heard a mild thud.

"Ouch," Another voice said. "God, you're like a freaking bullet."

Nana and Ren appeared in the doorway, with Satsuki hanging on Ren's arm.

"See Mom, I TOLD YOU it was them," Satsuki said happily. But Nana ignored her daughter. She was staring at Nana. Her eyeliner was just as dark as ever, the fingers still wearing her Vivienne Westwood rings, and she was wearing her favourite ripped jeans. Ren's dark hair was spiky as usual, with his padlock dangling around his neck and he was holding a bag.

"HACHI!" Nana exclaimed, and ran to hug her. Nana K. breathed in her familiar scent. She hugged her back, and held back her tears. There was so much she wanted to tell her, about now. And there would be time later.

"Hi guys," Ren announced to Yasu, Shin and Nobu. Nana O. turned to greet them too.

"Hello Baldy! Shin, Nobu, don't forget we've got another photo op on Wednesday. Ginpei will kill us if we're late. It's for a big thing."

"God Nana, we're on **holiday**. Remind us tomorrow," said Shin, lighting a Blast cherry flavoured cigarette. "Anyways, you guys need to get ready, the fireworks will start soon!"

Nana K. nodded and said, "I've laid out your stuff in your old room Nana. You guys just go take a bath."

"Hold on Hachi, I've got something here," Ren said, pulling something out of the bag he was carrying. It was a large, box, wrapped in shiny black paper. A large, bright pink ribbon rose sat on top of it. "Here you go," Ren said grinning, handing it over to a wide-eyed Satsuki. She took the box with an enthusiastic "Thank you Uncle Ren!" and proceeded to show it to Nobu, Shin and Yasu. Nana K. looked at Ren and Nana O.

"You shouldn't have! You'll spoil her silly," Nana K. said, smiling at Ren.

"Actually, Nana picked it out," Ren replied, nudging Nana's shoulder. She smiled at Nana K., and said "I thought it was just what she needed, as the god daughter of two rock stars."

Nana K. turned and saw Satsuki unwrapping her present. As she opened the box, she drew out a small black dress, complete with stockings. It was a total mix of Nana K and Nana O's style. Rock, but still vintage and cute. It had lacy sleeves, with lace fringe at the hem and sparkling pink beading sewn on the hem, collar and sleeves which made it appear to have shimmering pink lights. Satsuki held up the dress, her mouth slightly open and her eyes shining happily. Nana went to look closer at the dress, then squealed.

"It's ADORABLE! Nana, you shouldn't have!"

"Haha, it was nothing Hachi. I'll go take my bath now," Nana added, and went off to the bathroom.

Meanwhile, Satsuki was prancing around showing her dress off to Shin, while Yasu and Ren were talking about Blast's newest song. Only Nobu sat alone, and he was looking out the window, down to the lake. Nana looked at him silently, observing. His hair was as blonde as ever, and he wore it spiky, as he usually did. Ginpei didn't let him grow out his hair, as they needed to keep their punk rock image. His fingers were linked, and he leaned against his hands as he stared outside.

Nobu felt the light breeze on his face. The sounds of laughter, conversation, water running was faded. Being here, with everyone, reminded him of how things were last time, especially with Nana. It had been a while since he had been so near her. Light caught his eyes. The sun was setting. It brought back a memory, years ago, on the very same day. Down by the banks of that same glittering lake he was staring at, he had confessed himself to her. How he had promised her he would make her happy. He longed to turn it back. Turn it back and take responsibility. Fulfill the promise he had made. His eyes filled. The memory was too painful, too full of hurt. A quiet voice broke through his thoughts.

"Nobu."

_---_

_N.B. Sorry it took so long to post this up! Thanks to my one reviewer, SilverDragon21____ It meant a lot to me._


	3. Chapter III: For The Sake Of

**FOR THE SAKE OF**

_**N.B:**__ I was kinda stuck here for a while. I know it's getting draggy, but bear with me haha. The time frame after the anime is kinda hard to follow, so I gotta make it more up to date. Hope I can get farther with this chapter!_

"Nobu."

Nobu turned. Yasu and Ren were watching him closely. He shook himself.

"Yes? Sorry, what were you saying?"

"You were off in another world," laughed Ren. He watched Nobu carefully, and then switched his gaze to Nana, whose back was towards them as she packed up small bento boxes for them to bring along to the fireworks. Which would be starting in about half an hour.

"Ren was just asking about the arrangement for the song. You know, for the bass? He said it was interesting," Yasu related for Nobu.

"Oh, that. I don't know. Inspiration?" Nobu told Ren, shrugging. He looked back out the window. Shin ambled over with Satsuki hanging on his arm, then said to the trio, "Haven't we better be leaving soon?"

"Yes! I wanna see the fireworks! Mommy, are we going yet?" Satsuki added.

"Yes, we'll be going off soon," Nana told her. She grabbed the boxes and wrapped them deftly with a large piece of cloth, tying a neat bow. Then she crossed the room to the bathroom, and knocked smartly on the door.

"Nana, are you done?"

"Hachi? Come in here a while, and help me with my bow."

"Typical Nana," chuckled Yasu to Ren. Ren smiled dimly, then nodded slightly in Nobu's direction. Yasu followed his lead, then nudged Nobu.

"Hey, stop dreaming and help with the stuff," Yasu said, nodding to the kitchen.

"Yes, go carry the beer," Ren added. He picked up Satsuki and said to her, "You have Takumi's hair."

"Daddy's hair isn't like mine!" Satsuki said indignantly.

"Oh my God, she doesn't KNOW does she?" Shin added. He laughed and then checked himself as he remembered Nobu was behind him helping with the drinks. Then he bustled over and to help him.

"Your father used to have hair exactly like yours," Yasu told Satsuki.

"DID NOT!"

"He did. If you don't believe, ask your mother," Ren said to her. While Satsuki continued arguing with the two, Nobu was listlessly piling the beer into a bag. Shin grabbed a few cans and helped him out.

"You don't have to help Shin," Nobu said, looking up at him. "I can manage beer you know!"

"But often, the alcohol manages you," Shin shot back. They laughed. Nobu felt better. Shin always knew how to make him feel better. Even if Shin had to beat himself up doing it, he would. Always.

---

A haze of steam greeted Nana as she stepped into the bathroom. She sighed blissfully, and undressed. Dipping her foot experimentally into the water, she held on to the wall as she cautiously lowered herself in. She breathed a sigh of content. Nana loved it back here. The apartment, her friends, Ren, Hachi. She had missed her especially. They never got to see each other anymore. Hachi had Satsuki to think of… And Nana. She had photo shoots, rehearsals, recordings, interviews, more appointments than she would've liked. Although the Black Stones were already notorious for being underground and private, the paparazzi and the media insisted on trying to know more about them. The fact that Ren was her fiancé didn't help matters much either, or a fact which had recently been rooted out by the media about the fact that Takumi's wife was close friends with the famous singer of the Black Stones.

_No, _Nana thought, _not helpful at all._ She wondered vaguely how they had managed to figure that out, then realized she was stupid to not think that their old neighbours here wouldn't have noticed anything. There had been, after all, a mob here, way back when during their debut. What bothered Nana the most, was that the paparazzi was troubling Hachi. _As if she didn't have enough going for her._ Nana soaped herself a bit more. She was used to Ren cleaning her again now. It felt odd for her to bathe alone sometimes. Nana hugged herself in the warm bathwater and sighed. Her black nail polish stood out clearly. She doused herself one last time, and then pulled out the plug. She stood up and reached for the fleecy towel hanging on the doorknob, and dried herself thoroughly. The hot water always calmed her down and made her feel more relaxed. Nana put down the towel and as she pulled on the yukata, she heard a sharp rap at the door.

"Nana, are you done?" Nana called through the door.

"Hachi?" Nana called. She hadn't talked to her in a while. It was different now. Things couldn't be the same as it was back then, when it was just the two of them, where they could get all the closure she needed. Nana needed to know she was really alright.

"Come in here a while, and help me with my bow," Nana continued. She unlocked the door, and stood back to let her in. The Nana that stood before her now was different than that of the first time she met. _She's grown now,_ Nana thought. She wasn't sure if she liked this new Nana. _She seems so suppressed… I hope Takumi's treating her well._

"Hey Nana, turn around so I can help you with your bow," Nana said with a small smile.

Nana obliged. She rubbed her arms a little, and then said, "Hey Hachi, everything's alright, right?" Nana thought she felt the hands tying her bow stiffen slightly.

"Yes, they're fine, why do you ask?" Nana laughed. Funny. That didn't really sound like the Hachi Nana knew and loved. Her faithful companion that would confide everything into her, and could often bring a smile to everyone's face.

"Is Takumi treating you well? I mean, I'm sure you don't get to see him too much, but when he's home he's fine right?"

"Yes, he's fine. Satsuki's missed him a lot, and it's good that he has time to spend with her," Nana said. She finished tying the bow, and straightened Nana's yukata. Nana turned to face her, and placed her hands on her shoulders.

"Hachi, you know you can tell me anything right?"

Nana nodded. She absentmindedly rubbed a spot on her arm. Then she looked up and smiled.

"Of course! Anyway, it's time to go, or we're gonna be late for the fireworks!" Nana smiled, and then put her arm around her shoulders.

"Then let's go!"

---

"WOW!" Satsuki squealed delightedly. Nana K. stared at her daughter fondly. The sparkling light of the fireworks were reflected in her big eyes. Satsuki stood beside Yasu, and every so often she would yank impatiently on his sleeve and point to the sky.

"How do you see with those sunglasses on anyways?" She demanded. Everyone laughed loudly. Nana O. was seated on the grass. Nobu sat next to her, looking around. Nana K. was laughing while Shin and Ren were playing a drinking game. Nana O. looked up and saw that Nobu had settled his gaze on Nana K. Nobu's expression was guarded, but Nana was not a fool. She had known Nobu long enough to know that he still harboured something, deep down, no matter how he'd try to hide it. She watched Nobu's eyes light up a little as Nana laughed and egged both Ren and Shin on enthusiastically. Then he felt Nana O's eyes on him and hastily looked away. Nana looked back up at the fireworks and sipped from her can of beer.

"As if I didn't already know," she laughed softly. She nudged Nobu slightly.

"Know what? I was just watching Shin make and ass of himself," Nobu explained not very convincingly. Nana knew him too well. He wasn't really bothered with excuses. Not for her anyways. Or Ren. Or Shin. Actually, he was just basically easy for everyone to read. The thought made him feel slightly pathetic. Nana nudged him again, knowing what he felt.

"Don't beat yourself up. It's not your fault," Nana consoled. "It wasn't your choice to make."

"What are you talking about? She made the right choice," Nobu said, gesturing for Satsuki. "Takumi can give her a great life, one where she can have everything she needs. What can I give?"

"I wasn't talking about Satsuki. And it's not like we don't have money, so don't give me crap excuses," Nana replied. She sipped again as another firework burst high above them and showers of light fell from the heavens.

"She chose _him _Nana! What do you want me to do?" Nobu vented exasperatedly. He rubbed a hand over his hair and laid his forehead on his knees. Tears of frustration filled his eyes. _She has no idea,_ Nobu thought to himself. _She has no idea how hard it was for me to give her up, to just __**let her go**_ Nana watched him. She sighed. Then she lifted her head and looked at Nana again. She had stopped watching Ren and Shin already, and was staring up at the fireworks, which reflected in her eyes, so much like Satsuki's.

_Hey Hachi, I wonder if you knew, whether you'd come back. Come back to Nobu, into the world of Blast, away from Trapnest and Takumi. I wonder if you'll want to come back to my garden, someday. No matter when or how, would you come back?_

---

_N.B. Hey guys! So how did you like this chapter? By the way, in case you guys are wondering, I am actually trying to follow the original format of the anime. You know, at the beginning and the ending of each episode, one of the Nanas will narrate something. So there you have it. First 3 chapters are kinda like "one" episode of the anime. Albeit boring, but bear with me. Hope you enjoy it :D _

_**Special thanks **__to __**MysticalSaphira**__ and __**greensapphire **__for the reviews! I'm glad you liked the dress Satsuki got! And yes, the look Nobu gave Nana totally broke my heart too! _

_Review:) _


	4. Chapter IV: Left Behind

**LEFT BEHIND**

_**N.B. **__Hey readers :) I'm glad I have people reading my fan fiction. Although not many, but the fact that people enjoy what I write is enough for me to continue posting up these stories. I'll try to get at LEAST 1500 words this time. I just noticed, my stories are so short ."_

_---_

_Hey Nana, I'm not the girl you first met. Having Satsuki made me more grown up now. Watching her sometimes, it reminds me of when I first met you. Do you see that when you see her too? Are you happy, or are you sad that I've outgrown being that way?_

"Suki-chan!"

Nana briskly whipped up the fluffy pancakes from the spitting griddle and scooped them onto a pink willow patterned plate. She poured a glass of cool milk from a carton in the fridge into a clear glass, decorated with strawberries. Then she glanced at the clock again.

"Satsuki! Do you want to be late for school?" Nana called to her daughter again. She set the pancakes and the glass of milk onto the pink place setting where her daughter sat, along with honey and butter. Just as she had finished doing this, her daughter came out of her room, carrying her school bag.

"Sorry mom, I was looking for my socks," Satsuki said apologetically, while pulling on a pair of knee length pink socks decorated with black stripes. In her white blouse complete with a black bow, a black skirt and black shoes, Satsuki looked every inch a punky little girl.

"Sit down and eat quickly, the bus will come soon," Nana told her. While Satsuki ate her pancakes, Nana grabbed two pink ribbons and tied two pigtails on either side of her head. Then she took a patterned pink cloth and wrapped a bento box into it, tying a neat bow on top. She placed this into Satsuki's bag, while checking if she had all her books for the day and her pencil case, along with her water bottle. Nana handed the black shoulder bag to her daughter and Satsuki waved goodbye to her mother who stood in the doorway, watching her daughter go down to the bus. Nana went back into the house, and cleared up the remains of breakfast. She wiped down the counter and watered the plants, doing her daily chores.

"Suki-chan's gone to school?"

Nana started and managed not to drop the watering can onto the floor. She turned to face her husband who had just come out of their room and nodded. Takumi touched her head lightly. Nana bowed her head and her eyes remained fixed on the floor. He lifted her chin up and looked at her.

"What's wrong? Aren't you glad to see your husband home?" Takumi asked jokingly. Nana nodded. She stepped closer to him, and he rested his head on hers while his arms circled around her. He untied the ribbon which held her apron and it fell to the floor. Then he took the watering can out of her hand and placed it on the glass tabletop. Takumi pulled her down to the sofa.

---

Nana sat up. Ren lay sleeping, breathing softly beside her. She glanced at the clock by the bedside table. _Shit._ She was going to be late. Nana got lightly off the bed, careful not to wake Ren. He didn't have much time to rest while on tour, so now he was back, it was vital for him to get all the rest he needed. She crept quietly to the bathroom and turned on the shower. Steam rose as the water hit her body. As she shampooed her hair, she saw red, and a memory came briefly up to greet her.

"_Oh my God… What are you doing? Those roses look expensive."_

"_You're a rock star, what do you care? Besides, flowers don't last, so I'm enjoying them while I can."_

"_What a sad metaphor…"_

"_**Then make it last forever."**_

Nana looked sadly at the roses on the sink. She dunked her head under the water, and as the foam obscured her vision, felt two hands circle around her waist. She frantically tried to shake the water from her face and pulled at the hands, but then they pulled her out from under the stream and the thunder in her ears stopped and was replaced by the sound of Ren's deep voice.

"What are you doing?"

"BASTARD!!! You nearly scared me to death!" Nana screamed, her voice rebounding off the tiles. Ren just pulled her closer and laughed louder. Nana resisted for a while, and then slowly settled back into his embrace. Ren began to kiss her shoulders and neck. Nana turned to face him and kissed him slowly. Then she opened her eyes.

"I'm not doing it in the shower if that's what you're thinking," she told him, while eyeing him sourly.

"I wasn't going to ask you to," Ren replied, while grabbing a soapy cloth and scrubbing her down. She turned and allowed him to scrub her back. Then after a final douse of water, they both stepped out. Nana dressed hurriedly, while Ren casually pulled on his pants and lit a cigarette. He gazed out the huge bay window at the city. Nana dumped a pot full of water onto the stove, and added miso, along with seaweed, tofu and some mushrooms. She whisked the mixture, the calmly scooped out two bowls. Ren joined her at the table, waiting for his soup to cool while Nana attempted to drink it while it was still hot.

"If you drink it any faster, your throat's gonna blister and you're not gonna be able to sing like that," Ren commented. Nana glared. She blew on her soup impatiently then took a hesitant sip.

"I'm late, so let's see you do any better," she returned, talking through her soup. Ren went to the kitchen and opened the fridge, pouring out a glass of apple juice. Then he set it down in front of Nana, who had nearly finished her soup.

"Drink this, it'll cool it down."

Nana gratefully downed the cool juice and then waved goodbye to Ren as her cell phone began to ring. She took a glance at the caller ID, grimaced at Ren and headed out, the door closing behind her with a slam. Ren smiled slightly. He took a small spoonful of soup. _As usual,_ he thought. _Too salty for consumption._ Ren smiled to himself and downed the bowl, cool from his waiting. It may have been too salty, but he would drink it no other way.

---

BEEP.

The van honked rudely as Nana came out of the lobby. Someone inside opened the door for her, and Nana threw herself inside next to a sleeping Shin. Nobu and Yasu sat behind, Ginpei up front. He turned around to face Nana.

"Nana-sama, you are late!"

"Sorry, but you're wasting time scolding me," Nana said cheekily.

"Oh yes, Ren's back isn't it," Ginpei stated mildly. "Since he is distracting you from work, maybe you should move back to the dorm… Or maybe it's Trapnest's plan!"

"Now now, Ginpei, we're late as it is," Yasu said quietly, and Ginpei blushed.

"Oh of COURSE Ya-san! I'll get us there right away," he said happily and gunned the engine. Yasu sighed as Nobu laughed. Shin snored.

They reached Gaia Records and piled out of the van, straight to the studio. Kawano and Matsuo were waiting for them already.

"Nana! Oh good. You're all here already," Kawano said excitedly. He gestured for them to come over. "Make up in 10 minutes!"

Nana braced herself. She did not enjoy having the spotlight of the media on her. When the cameras started rolling, there was only one thing she would focus on. Hachi.

---

"Jun-chan, look! It's Nana!" Nana squealed excitedly. Satsuki bounced up and down as well, while peering excitedly, her black head blocking Junko's view of the screen.

"Yes I see her Nana," Junko said demurely. She looked around. "Where's Takumi?"

"Oh he had business to do as usual. He's never too free on holidays," Nana replied. She rubbed a spot absently on her arm. Junko watched her. On the screen, the Black Stones were rocking the stage with their new song, "Not Today".

"Doesn't he tell you where he is at all?" Junko asked quietly. She was barely heard over the heavy bass of Shin's guitar and Yasu's cymbals. Nana shook her head. Satsuki was oblivious and stuck to the screen. Junko was surprised. Nana could never tear her eyes away from the screen when Nana was performing or giving some interview or whatnot.

"He's always been busy," Nana said to the floor. She looked out the window, and the moon was full.

---

The black Gelandewagen purred along the road smoothly. It turned down a road and stopped in front of a large town house. Reira unbuckled her seat belt.

"Well, this is me," she said laughing nervously. Takumi blew out a breath of smoke.

"Get more sleep Reira," he said to her kindly. She nodded, but instead of getting out of the car, she turned to him.

"Are you going home?"

"No, I might stop by the studio to check up," he replied, surprised. "Why?"

Reira bit her lip.

"No reason."

She made to open the car door, when Takumi grabbed her arm.

"I hope you're not thinking of what I think you're going to do," he said lightly. Reira settled back into her seat, and looked at him.

"And what is that?" she asked calmly. But inside, Reira was shaking.

"Call Shin."

Reira clenched her mouth tightly. She would not let him see through her.

"No. I am not."

Takumi exhaled again and a smoke circle drifted lazily in front of him.

"Good. Because it wouldn't be doing either of you any favours, if you were caught." Takumi looked out the window. Reira stared at her hands in her lap, angry and upset and what he had said. _What would __**he**__ know! He has __**no**__ idea!_ Reira's hands formed fists. Takumi noticed and sighed. He placed a hand on her head and patted it. Reira looked up and pulled his hand away.

"Don't try to be so patronizing Takumi," Reira spat. She shook her head and her blonde curls flew around.

"I'm not, Reira."

"You can't expect me to be happy like this do you? How do you expect me to sing anymore?" Reira demanded eyes bright in anger. "It's easy for you to talk, being married and having your happy life! Shin was all I had, and you had to take him away too! First you, then Ren, then you took away Shin…" Reira's voice broke. Her hands went to her face and covered it. Tears fell.

Takumi sighed. He leant in to comfort her. Reira turned and sobbed on his shoulder, drenching his expensive shirt. He patted her head fondly. He got out the car, and then went to the other side, dropped and stubbed out his cigarette. The he opened the passenger door, and helped Reira out, right into the house. The door closed behind them.

---

_**N.B. **__Hey readers! I got a lot more reviews, and I'm so happy!!! Thank you so much :D They really mean a lot to me. Hope you enjoy this chapter! And keep reviewing :) Thanks again to __**MysticalSaphira,**__**greensapphire and Seanluvzju.**__ You guys kept me going!_


	5. Chapter V: Tick Tock

**TICK TOCK**

_**N.B. **__Hey people :) Sorry I haven't been writing much, been really busy and lazy haha. Slightly sad due to lack of reviews haha. But I'll go on. Hope you like this chapter._

_---_

Nana glanced at the clock. The dimly lit room seemed to press slowly onto her; a certain pressure seemed to be on her shoulders. She glanced at the clock again.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

It was one in the morning.

_Why isn't he home yet?_

---

Nana glanced at the clock. The darkness closed in all around her, a welcoming relief from all the spotlights and highlights that had been shining on her the whole day. She sighed heavily, and closed her eyes. A lot had happened earlier that day, and she desperately needed sleep. However, something seemed to pull her back slightly. She glanced at the clock again.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

It was one in the morning.

Nana turned on her side and sighed softly. The moonlight revealed Ren's profile, sleeping on his side, his back towards her. She hadn't told him yet. And again, wondered how she would. She mentally replayed the conversation they had today with Gaia, right after their shoot.

"_Nana, Yasu, Shin, Nobu. We have decided. It is time."_

Nana closed her eyes. This was the best thing that ever happened to Blast. It would be the making of them. Thanks to their shadowy association with Trapnest, the Black Stones were charting extremely high, but there was only one reason for their continued ruling of the charts: they were good. "Not Today" was currently the number one hit in Japan. Blast had ruled the scene for a very long time. It had been six years since their debut, and they still ruled the scene. Six years, and in that time, their music had spread everywhere.

It was time.

---

Shin checked his phone, and then threw it aside with a small sigh. He had no missed calls. He had no new messages. Something was wrong with this. Shin grabbed his cell to check the time.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

It was one in the morning.

He threw his phone back on the couch, frustrated. _What the hell,_ he thought, and then he dialed Nobu's number.

---

Nobu's phone rang. He reached for it sleepily, then dropped his arm. It rang again. The caller seemed persistent. Nobu sighed, pulled the covers off him a little, and grabbed his phone. He checked the called ID cautiously first, before barking a little irritated "WHAT?" into the phone.

"Hey hey, no need to SHOUT," Shin's voice said warily. Nobu heard him take a long drag on his cigarette.

"It's…" Nobu checked his clock.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

It was five past one in the morning.

"It's ONE IN THE MORNING SHIN!" Nobu yelled into the tiny contraption.

"I just wanted to know if you were interested in a drink!" Shin replied, then added quietly, "I can't sleep."

Nobu's anger evaporated. It wasn't like Shin to just call at any time of the night, just to go for a drink. When things like this happened, Nobu knew something was up. _Sure, he doesn't tell me, but I'm not an idiot,_ he thought, albeit grumpily. He rubbed his short messy spikes.

"You buy. I'm too lazy to go out."

"You got it."

"See you." Nobu chucked his phone back on the bed, then stretched and fell back on it as well. He lay for a while, staring up at his ceiling. He liked being back at his place, rather than at a hotel like Shin. _But his home is elsewhere, _Nobu remembered, and thought back to those little conversations they both shared about their past, while living together back way before their debut.

"_Is it that bad?" Nobu nudged Shin's shoulder. He was careful not to poke too much. It was obvious he didn't like talking about it._

"_It wasn't that bad, we weren't exactly starving or anything," Shin said. He sipped from his glass. He looked out the window at the horizon. It glowed a beautiful fireball orange. "I just never felt free, you know?"_

_Nobu knew. And he understood. They inhaled from their cancer sticks in an almost brotherly way. _

"_I get it."_

"_I knew you would. After all, you sort of came from the same right? Mine was more… Pressurized. Never good enough. I'll show them whose better," he muttered under his breath. Nobu glanced sideways at Shin. His head was on his knees, and he tapped his beer can moodily. _

"_Not living up to your older siblings huh?" Nobu asked shrewdly. He took another swig. Shin sat up, slightly surprised. _

"_Wow Nobu, I never expected you to be so clairvoyant," he chuckled. Nobu gave him an irritated stare._

"_Oi punk, you're in my house and don't you know how to respect your elders?"_

"_That was what they said too. When I told them I wasn't born to be a replacement son."_

_Nobu looked at Shin. His eyes reflected the last of the day, a dying light, enveloped by the darkness._

---

Yasu saved the document, and then closed his laptop with a sigh.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

It was four in the morning.

He stubbed out the remains of his cigarette, and then peeped through his blinds out into the street. The streetlights had gone out, and the cool dark calm of dusk was anticipating the fiery streaks of sunlight. Yasu turned to lie down on his bed.

He snapped off the lights, and closed his eyes. The room was cold. Yasu wrapped the covers around him a little more tightly. It had been a long while since he shared the cool of his bed with another warm being, someone to hold while the day came. A brief memory came up to him, and he brushed it away impatiently. He was over that ages ago anyways. Now there was only one he wanted to be with, but she had someone else to give her warmth to.

---

Reira reached for the warmth. Her hand moved out, then up and down. Then she reluctantly opened her eyes. He was gone. It was almost as if he was never there; the place where he lay was cold. Reira glanced at the clock on her beside table.

_Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock._

It was four in the morning.

Reira reached for her phone and flipped it open. No missed calls. No new messages. Reira closed her phone dejectedly. _Doesn't he care if I'm not there?_ She thought bitterly. Reira turned onto her side. The cool metal of her phone soon turned warm within the harsh grip of her fist, which grew slack in the light of the dawn. The phone fell to the floor with a soft _thud_.

---

Takumi's car was parked at the corner of his building. A thin grey haze of smoke drifted out of the open window. Takumi tossed the last of his cigarette out the small gap of the window. He glanced up at the building. The first light of the morning reflected the clean panes of windows. Takumi looked down again. He sighed and pushed his hair off his face. He got out of the car then, and headed into the building.

The sunlight dimmed slightly, as a cloud passed momentarily over it. For a minute, the shadow standing at the window that Takumi was peering up at was visible.

---

Nana saw the figure close the door of the black jeep, then enter the building. The rays of sunlight hit her face, showing the worries and cares that had gathered over the years. It was dawn. The sun was rising. It was almost time to start the day. Remembering her husband, she headed hurriedly into the room. She pulled the covers over herself, as she heard the key turn in the lock.

_Tick. Tock._

_**N.B. **__I hope you guys didn't get mad while waiting so long for me to post this up! Its 2:33 in the morning, I'm gonna crash now. Just wanted to get this to my word limit. I love you guys so much ngehehe._

_Review?_


	6. Chapter VI: The Plunge

**THE PLUNGE**

_**N.B. **__Sorry guys :( I'M RUNNING OUTTA IDEAS! I know how I want the story to go, but I feel sad having to go this route to get it there TT Stick with me! Thanks so much to __**greensapphire **__and __**MysticalSaphira**__ for their reviews! _

---

"_Let me in, into your heart,_

_Let me in, into your head,_

_I don't know where to start,_

_There's so much left to be said."_

"That's a nice tune," Nana said suddenly, startling Nobu out of his fog.

"Hey Nana," he said, while putting the guitar to the side. He leaned his head back against the wall.

"What's up with the emo lyrics?" Nana laughed at him. She sat down beside him and lit up a Seven Star. "We should put it into a song. Sing it out before we leave. Not much time left. Maybe you should sing it," Nana added quietly.

"Why would **I** sing it?" Nobu asked surprised.

"Because it's **your** message," Nana said, eyebrows raised. She blew out a plume of smoke, waiting for Nobu's excuse. He struggled, opened his mouth, thought better of it, and slumped back against the wall in defeat.

"Damn. I hate being so easy to read," he cried jokingly.

"HAHA! You're just too obvious. Ever since, your riffs have taken a sadder twist," Nana said. "Don't spoil our punk rock image!" She poked him in the ribs. "Why have we given up Nobu?" Nana asked suddenly.

"Because, we want her to be _happy,_" Nobu replied softly. He resumed strumming his guitar.

"We've been on the scene for 6 years. Trapnest has been on for 9. In the past few years, we've become as big, or even bigger," Nana concluded. "**We've** got everything we've tried to achieve. Our reputation is stable. Now we can go after what makes each of us **happy**."

Nobu looked up in surprise. "So you're finally taking the plunge."

"Ren and I decided to do it on the day we met. You know, that day you took me to that concert, and I met him backstage. We discussed this with our managers already."

"Congratulations!" Nobu said excitedly. "Who's best man? Me? Or probably Yasu, knowing how close they are," Nobu mocked crying again.

"Haha, yes, Yasu will be the best man. Anyways, we're making it private. We'll let the press know, but otherwise it's strictly friends, family and all that jazz," Nana filled him in. Nobu listened intently, but as she waved her hand around, he saw a dark glimmer. A ring rested on her wedding finger, a silver ring, embedded with a huge diamond cut into the shape of a rose. It was a black stone. For the Black Stones.

---

"OH MY GOD!!!"

Junko caught her water glass just in time.

"WHAT?! I NEARLY BROKE SOMETHING!" She yelled back at Nana. Satsuki came barreling out of her room.

"Mommy, what is it?" She asked excitedly. Nana came into the room, holding a piece of black paper and a black envelope, with silver writing on it. Her eyes were huge, and she held up the paper and screamed

"NANA AND REN ARE GETTING MARRIED THIS SATURDAY!!!"

Junko's glass fell. "Oh my God." Satsuki ran and hugged her mother.

"Hey mom, does this mean I get a new dress?"

"Yes we're all getting new dresses! Junko, you have to come too. Nana wrote that she wanted you to come with Kyosuke on an enclosure. THIS IS SO COOL!" Nana danced around excitedly with her daughter. Junko watched, thinking how much her goddaughter Satsuki was like her idiotic mother.

"Let's go shopping right away!" Nana declared.

---

Reira sat down on the edge of her bed, the black envelope beside her. She knew what it contained; they had all known that Ren had discussed the right time of the "merging" or the Black Stones and Trapnest with both managers. She still felt as if something had died inside her when she saw the envelope. Ren was one of her closest friends, and now he was gonna be taken away by Blast too. _Why is it that everything I value in life has to be taken away by Blast?_ She thought sadly.

Right now, she needed something. She picked up her phone and pressed a speed dial.

"Hello? Shin? Can you come over for a bit?"

About a quarter of an hour later, someone knocked on the door. Reira got up to open it, revealing Shin, wearing dark sunglasses, a dark overcoat with skinny jeans. His Vivenne Westwood lighter glinted on his chest.

"What's up Reira?" he asked. She beckoned him into the flat. "No, I'm fine out here," he replied.

"What if someone walks along and sees?" She returned. Shin thought for a while, and then entered.

"Do you want anything? Water?" Reira asked complacently. He shook his head. His blonde locks went into his eyes. Reira sometimes missed the blue.

"Why'd you call?" He asked, to the point. "I thought we weren't supposed to see each other anymore." Reira held up the black envelope in answer.

"Did you know?"

"Yeah, found out. We all knew it was gonna happen sooner or later," Shin said. "Is that all?" He turned to walk out the door.

Reira felt an unrestrained urge and blurted out, "Why are you being so **mean**?" The minute she said it, she regretted it. _I sound like a schoolgirl. Now he's gonna leave for sure._ Shin stopped in his tracks. He turned around slowly, and his eyes were pointed towards the floor. When he looked up, they were regretful.

"I don't think I should've come then," He said softly. "Sorry for being mean." He left.

Reira watched him close the door softly on his way out, heard the elevator's '_ding'_ and then the silence enveloped her again. She threw herself on her bed and cried.

---

Shin breathed in deeply. The elevator hummed quietly along with his rhythmic breathing. _In, out, in out._ He knew he did the right thing. _I __**have**__ to be mean_, he thought calmly. _That's the only way she'll get over it._ But inside, Shin's heart didn't agree. His heart didn't agree at all as he thought of that time, long ago, during their first live interview together. They were on a break, in the van.

"_It's my birthday soon. I'm old!" Reira wailed._

"_Really? It's __**my**__ birthday soon too!" Shin had replied excitedly._

"_You're a Gemini too?!" Reira squealed. "It's the red string of fate! We were meant to be together!"_

"_Haha, at least when you are one year older, I am too, so there's no difference."_

Shin opened his eyes. The elevator reached the lobby. He stalked out, ignoring everyone around him, keeping his head low, and fearing being recognized. _If anyone saw me going up, I am __**so**__ dead. _He quickly hailed a cab outside and sped back to his hotel.

---

The cab slowed outside a row of buildings. Yasu got out, holding his briefcase and went up to his apartment. He had some work to do. As the years went by, although he was in the Black Stones, he was still working in his law firm, and had become quite successful, practicing whenever he was free. The firm understood he had some commitments, and allowed him to take what he could, and pass up what he couldn't do. He reached home, flicked on the lights and turned on his laptop. His answering machine blinked red, and he pressed to listen to the messages.

BEEP

"Hey Yas, its Ren. Anyways, about the wedding, they've agreed to allow it this Saturday, as you guys are gonna go on your World Tour soon, so it'll be good advertising or whatever Take said. The details are being sent to everyone's houses. Anyways, gotta go now, Takumi wants to go over some details. See ya!"

BEEP

"YASU! DID REN ASK YOU TO BE THE BEST MAN? I'll take over for you if you don't wanna haha. Anyways, just wanna tell you I've got the melody done already for the new song. I'll send it over to you via a messenger. Take a listen and then you can ask Nana to put in her lyrics or whatever. And ask Shin to write his part. Thanks! Nobu here by the way."

BEEP

"Hey Yasu… It's Reira. Nothing's wrong, just wanted to talk to someone. It's so boring here. Anyways, wanna meet up? Argh, you're probably at work anyways. Never mind. Bye."

The machine rung off.

_Hey Hachi, it's gonna be my big day soon. Will you be happy to share me with someone else? I wish we could all stay together, like the old days, when we used to stay in that house by the lake._

---

_**N.B. **__Hey guys! Hope you liked this one. Sorry it took so long to write . I was wondering, as I wrote this story, if any of my readers are guys. Nana's such a girl manga to me :) See you! Hope I get the inspiration for the next chapter soon._


	7. Chapter VII: Second Chances

**SECOND CHANCES**

_**N.B. **__Sorry guys for taking so long :( I was kinda gonna give up this fan-fic for a while. But I kept getting story alerts, showing me people still actually DO read this fan-fiction :D And also reminding me that I haven't written in a while. So I shall attempt to continue this. Wish me luck. Thanks especially to __**emir**__ for the review :)_

_---_

_Hey Nana, I wish I could. I want to do it over again, everything, I would do it differently. If I could, I'd take the chance, put away all the regrets. Will I ever get that chance?_

Roses, deep blood red, were placed everywhere around the church. People were jostling around, arms full of drapes, decorating the glistening wooden pews. A dark red carpet was being rolled by two guys to the altar. They huffed and puffed to get it straightened out properly. They looked back down the aisle, at their co-workers struggling to tie decorative knots, securing the most important part of the aisle: the dark canopy of ivy and roses that hung above it.

Elsewhere, a small ballroom was also undergoing heavy preparation. Red tablecloths were being spread over numerous tables, and white roses placed pristinely in glass bowls in the centre of each table. Silverware was aligned perfectly, along with a tiny black box complete with a red ribbon containing gifts for the guests. Yasu stood watching all this, and alerted the hotel manager to a small problem.

"Sorry, but just to check again, this is a smoking hall yes?" Yasu asked anxiously.

"Ah, yes, I'll have them put out the ashtrays. It is all taken care of," the manager said pleasantly. Yasu smiled gratefully in return. His cell phone rang out suddenly.

"Hello?"

"It's me 3. How are the preparations going?"

"Oh, Ren. Yes, it's all going well. I never asked, what's in the guest boxes? They came already wrapped."

"Haha, I special ordered them. I love paying attention to detail. But you'll just have to see when they open," Ren said tauntingly. "Do you think Nana will like it?" He added nervously. "I mean, we're not supposed to see each other until the ceremony. Which is in a few hours."

"Hmm, Nana is unpredictable, but yes, I'm sure she'll like it. I'll see you at the church. Later."

---

"IT'S BEAUTIFUL!" Nana exclaimed. She danced around, peering into the mirror at the bride. "But why are you wearing black on your wedding day Nana?" She asked, dismayed. "You're supposed to wear white, or a traditional wedding kimono!"

Nana exhaled a plume of smoke right into her friend's face. "I am not going to wear a kimono. And besides, I like black. Also, this is not for the ceremony. I'm wearing something else for that. And stop dancing around Hachi!"

Nana K. pouted, pulling a face. "Show me what you're gonna wear later!"

"No. Satsuki, are you ready? I want to see how you look, as the flower girl," Nana O. called to her.

"Okay Auntie Nana, I'm done," Satsuki called triumphantly, pulling aside her dressing room curtain to reveal a tiny frilly red dress with sparkling black beading, cut to just about her knees. The red made her hair shine even darker than usual. Completing the outfit were the most awesome knee high black glossy dominatrix boots with laces. On Satsuki, she looked like a tiny anime character.

"Oh you look so beautiful!" Her mother exclaimed excitedly. She had on her bridesmaid's dress of a dark red too, a bigger version of Satsuki's. Minus the knee high boots. "I can't believe you customized these from Vivienne Westwood!"

"You DID?" Junko exclaimed. "Wow that must've cost a lot of money, not that it matters to you of course."

"Well, of course I did. You think I can get these from anywhere? And I would never get anything less than Vivienne for my last day of freedom. Anyways, we'd better go. Help me change Hachi," Nana said.

"You're definitely having the most punk rock wedding in the whole history of weddings," Junko laughed. "I can't wait for it!" She watched as Nana O. pulled on her own dark red dress, a long train sparkling with black beads to a short cut in front, revealing the same knee high boots Satsuki was wearing. The dress was long sleeved, with black lace extending from her shoulders to her wrist, and a loop of lace going over her middle finger, as well as frills going down the front and a high frilly collar. In short, it was exactly like the dress she had worn when she had met Ren, just now customized with a train and small minor decorative modifications. Black buttons gleamed down her middle and her cufflinks were black too.

Nana K. stepped back to admire her former roommate. What she saw made tears well up in her eyes. "You look beautiful," she breathed for the third time. Nana O. turned to look at her, and smiled.

"So do you Hachi. So do you."

---

Guests had already started arriving. Shin retreated to the inner chambers of the church, where Nobu was dressing. "Hey, people are here already!" He exclaimed to Nobu, who was trying to tie a proper knot. His face was screwed up in concentration, and he sighed theatrically as his bowtie went wonky yet again. Shin laughed. The door to the chamber opened again, and both of them turned to see who it was. A haze of red silk greeted them, and Nana walked in, with Satsuki.

"Hey Hachi, you look cute!" Shin told her. "You look cute too Suki-chan," he added when she pouted.

"Thanks Shin," Nana said, smiling at him. "You look so different nowadays, it's such a good change," she said, reminiscing.

"Uncle Nobu! You look funny!" Satsuki remarked, pointing at Nobu's bowtie and laughing. It had uncoiled and draped around his neck like a cravat. Nobu sighed. "Maybe I should ditch the bow?" he asked.

"No! It's a formal affair. Come on, I'll help," Nana offered. She crossed the room as Shin announced he was going out to see the guests, Satsuki tagging along. The door closed behind them softly. Nana gently pulled apart the bowtie, smoothing out the creases, and then began to retie the knot. Nobu shifted a bit uncomfortably. It had been a while since they were that close. Nana eyes darted up to his face, and noticed he was staring down at her. She smiled up at him and continued tying.

"What's up Nobu? You seem to have something on your mind." Nobu sighed and looked heavenward. Hands in his pockets, he replied, "Just that I feel weird doing this. Nana and Ren, finally taking the plunge."

Nana laughed softly. "Well, you'll take it too someday! I mean when you find-" She cut herself off mid sentence. Her eyes darted around nervously. _Oh Nana, you IDIOT! How can you be so selfish? _Nobu glanced down at her with a small smile. "I've already found her," he told her. Nana's head was bent. She pulled the ends of the bow, straightening it, and then smoothed Nobu's lapels.

"There you go. You're done. I need to check on Nana now, she'll almost be ready," she said turning to the door. Nobu grabbed her hand suddenly.

"Nana."

---

"Where's Hachi?" Nana asked Junko. "She's supposed to help me get ready!"

"She just went to check on the boys," Junko replied, adjusting Nana's straps. She glanced at her in the mirror. "Wow girl, you look great!"

"I'd better, it's my last day of freedom," Nana laughed. The door opened, and Nana K. walked in. "Yo Hachiko! Where've you been?"

"Oh, I was just checking up on the boys. Nana, you look beautiful!" she exclaimed, fawning over her best friend. Junko smiled at the both of them, and said, "I'm going to go out now. It's nearly time. Good luck!" Both the Nanas looked at each other as she left.

"Oh Nana, I can't believe you're finally getting married!" Nana K. said happily, hugging her. "You and Ren will be great! You'll be so happy together!" Nana O. hugged her back hard. Then she drew back and looked at Nana K. in her eyes.

"Hachi, you are happy aren't you?" she asked. Nana K. paused, and smiled.

"Of course I am! I have everything I've wanted: the house with the yard, cooking every day, Satsuki…" She trailed off. Nana O. looked hard at her.

"Takumi?" she added. Nana K. looked down at her feet. Nana O. sighed and continued. "Please promise me this one thing at least." Nana K. looked up. "Of course," she replied. "What is it?

---

The orchestra started. Everyone was in their places; the guests in the pews, turning to the chapel doors obediently to watch the bride's procession; Satsuki was walking down the aisle with perfect little bouncy steps, scattering the flowers left and right; Yasu and Nobu both standing by Ren's side at the altar. Nana walked behind her daughter, holding her own small bouquet and smiling widely. Her eyes met those of her husband's in the first pew, and he smiled back at her while nodding her on. Nana looked at Ren, and then noticed Nobu. He was standing straight, next to Yasu and his eyes were upon her also. His smile was small, sincere, and sad. It was a smile of defeat.

The bride walked right behind her best friend, face covered by a black veil embroided with tiny little beaded red roses. Everyone watched her journey down the aisle, unfaltering and each step the proud, haughty walk of the lead singer of the Black Stones. Cameras flashed; the reporters in the back row were taking as much as they could from their bad seating. Nana watched as her goddaughter and her best friend filed off to her left, and her eyes were filled with tears which she blinked back hard as she reached her fiancé. Ren smiled and took her hand. They turned to the pastor, who now smiling, opened his book and began to read aloud.

Nana K. smiled as her friends said their vows, as they exchanged white-gold rings, and as Ren bent down to kiss his wife. She smiled as they led the procession down the red carpet, flowers and bubbles being thrown and blown by the guests raining down on their heads, the bride's face fixed with happiness, the groom smiling and then picking up his bride and whirling her around. The flashes and her tears blurred Nana's vision once again, but she saw one person standing back with her while everyone surged forward to congratulate the happily wedded couple. Their eyes met, and she held his gaze, this time boldly and not looking away. Two damp spots within a burning fire.

---

"HAHA! Oh my God, that's hilarious!" Nana O. roared with laughter. Ren was laughing too, and trying to support his now drunken bride, which was not really going well as he had had one too many himself. Everyone was chatting and laughing happily, the wedding dinner finished and toasts all made. Games had been played, the cake had been eaten and now more than half the wedding guests were happily smashed, including Ginpei, who was being supported by Yasu, up to a hotel room, assisted by two waiters.

"Just take him up," Yasu said exasperatedly to the two waiters, who nodded immediately and proceeded to drag the manager to the lifts. Yasu sighed and returned to the party. Naoki, Reira, Takumi, Take and Shin were playing a complicated drinking game, and both Naoki and Take were pretty much down for the count.

"I'm gonna win this Takumi!" Reira declared. She picked up another card and pointed dramatically at Shin. "Ha! Drink up!"

Shin knocked back the shochu with ease, and picked up his card. "Your turn to drink Takumi," he gestured. Takumi sighed. "We're the only ones still sober because you're an alcoholic, I've got great tolerance and Reira's just good at cards! I'm gonna see what Ren's doing," he said, getting up to Ren's table. He went over to Nana K., who was supporting a sleeping Satsuki's head on her lap.

"Shh," she whispered. "She doesn't need anymore noise."

"I'll take her up to the room," Takumi offered, lifting up his daughter and carrying her towards the hotel lifts.

"YASU!" Ren said happily as Yasu came back to the table. He hugged him hard and Nana slumped onto his lap. Then she sat up, stick straight and proclaimed, "I haven't thrown my bouquet yet!" She stood up unsteadily, Nana supporting her, saying, "Nana, I think that's enough, maybe you should go sleep."

"Hachi! Don't ruin the fun, it's my wedding night!" Nana complained. "Okay women, line up now! Right in the front of the stage!" She staggered towards the stage, her black dress glittering with silver beads. "Okay! Misato! Come over here! You too Hachi!" Nana declared into the mike.

"But Nana, this is only for women who are single," Misato called, Nana K. nodding fervently.

"Both of you get down there! Come on, everyone's there already. Okay? One, two, THREE!"

The bouquet of red and white roses soared through the air, baby's breath waving in the breeze. Arms reached up for it, hopeful eyes turned to follow its wide arc which sailed right into Nana's arms. Misato gasped and cheered. Nana O. turned around delightedly asking "Who caught it? Who caught it?" A startled Nana now held the bouquet in her arms, while girls surged around her, some upset, others laughing. Ren and Yasu laughed, while Nana cheered, "Hey Hachi, you're gonna get married again!" Her cheer turned to surprise, laughter turned to silence as Nobu, who had been making his way towards the centre of the crowd to Nana K., now knelt in front of her on one knee, and opening a black box he had taken from his breast pocket revealing a beautifully cut pink diamond, he asked into the stunned silence, "Nana Komatsu, will you marry me?"

---

_**N.B.**__ Yes I know, shocking :) But I've always envisioned it to be this way. I hope you guys aren't bored; this is a rather long chapter. Must be a new record :) Reviews make me smile! _


	8. Chapter VIII: Following Your Heart

**FOLLOWING YOUR HEART ISN'T ALWAYS EASY**

_**N.B. **__Yes, I do suddenly seem to be updating more lately! I'm surprised to see I still have readers :D It's so nice to get reviews from you guys. Really motivates me to get writing hint hint :) Thanks __**again **__to __**emir **__and __**greensapphire**__ for reviewing. I'm glad you didn't see that coming haha. And yes indeed, what about Takumi:P_

---

Nana Komatsu was still as a statue, eyes open in shock, silence washing around her like waves, except for the voice which repeated itself over and over again.

"Nana Komatsu, will you marry me?"

But Nana wasn't in the ballroom anymore, surrounded by a sea of girls watching open-eyed and open-mouthed; or watched by a shocked Nana, on the stage, still holding the microphone to her mouth; Ren, Yasu and Shin staring confused at their friend who knelt in front of her. No, Nana was in her hotel room, a sleeping Satsuki snoring lightly in the connecting room next door on which Junko and Kyosuke had closed the door.

"Nana, are you alright now?" Junko asked worriedly. She handed her a glass of water which she had poured from a pitcher. "Here, drink up," she encouraged, as Nana took the glass from her blankly and took a hesitant sip. Junko glanced at Kyosuke and signaled to him with her eyebrows.

"Nana, talk to us," he gently offered. He nudged her slightly with his arm. Nana took a long deep breath. Her heart was beating a violent tattoo inside her chest.

_What do I do, what do I do, what do I do._

---

Ren's arm was around Nana, Yasu, Shin and Nobu sat on the other sofas, quiet and awkward. Nobu's head was bent, head in hands, elbows on knees. Every eye in the room was fixed on him. Nobu looked up suddenly, aware that they were all staring. He ran his hands through his hair, leaned back heavily and sighed. Nana crossed her arms, expression worried and confused. Ren clucked his tongue in the silence, and everyone turned to him instead.

"Sorry, awkward silence," he said apologetically. Yasu and Shin laughed slightly, trying to lighten the mood. However, Nana's gaze turned back to Nobu, who looked back at her steadily, preparing himself for her tirade. Surprisingly, she was smiling as she asked, "When did you get the ring?" Nobu astonishment at the question quickly faded to a smile, and he answered her question with a happy nod. The others' stunned faces melted into expressions of pride.

"Glad you finally managed to decide what you wanted," Nana said, and Shin nodded his agreement.

"Nana's right Nobu. I'm glad you fessed up. About time. You've had years to think about it," said Shin.

"About six years of time," Nobu replied sadly. "I'm not sure she's happy about this. I don't know what came over me. I mean, I wasn't **ever** going to tell her. Ever. She's MARRIED. What am I thinking?!" Nobu exclaimed sadly.

"Look, snap out of it man," Ren supplied. "You've done the deal already. Let her sign and seal it all the way. The fact that she's not already rejected you **shows something** right?" Yasu nodded and added, "She's obviously got some life thinking to be doing right now. Granted, maybe this wasn't the best time to do this," he said, gesturing towards Ren and Nana, "but it shows that you're sincere about it, putting yourself on the line there right in front of everyone."

Nobu shook his head slowly. "I still can't believe what I just did man. I bought that ring ages ago, six years ago to be precise. I was going to propose, no, marry her, if she chose me. But she chose him. Takumi. And all these years, I've just been keeping it, wondering if I should ever give it to her, or if I could ever tell her…" he trailed off.

"Speaking of Takumi, where is he?" Yasu asked pointedly. They all looked at each other simultaneously.

"Oh crap," Nobu said audibly.

---

Reira stood on the balcony of her room, cool air blowing her white sheer dress about. The black roses on her dress enhanced her pale complexion, and the fairness of her hair.

"I'm so sick of this," Reira said aloud, hugging herself against the wind. Her hair whipped across her face, and tears welled up in her eyes. "I don't want to be alone."

"You're not alone," Takumi said, nudging a glass to her. He took a swig of his, and faced the view of the dark sea, waves crashing upon the beach and a cold full moon bright against the black sky, littered with silver stars. She took a gulp and made a face, tears evaporating with the wind.

"Thanks," she said grudgingly, and he nodded her sentiment. "How did you know I came up here anyways?"

"I didn't. I was putting Satsuki to sleep, when I saw you. I didn't follow you or anything," he said humourously.

"No, I just wish you did," Reira whispered into the wind. Takumi looked at her, surprised. Then he turned back to his whiskey, and took another swig.

"You know I'm not that good a man Reira. I'm not good enough for you," he said to her. "I'm not good enough to be loved," he added softly. Reira heard.

"So you're saying she deserves you?" Reira said, whirling on him. "She's your equal?"

"That's different," Takumi replied, still not looking at her. "She got knocked up. I was the father. I'm not a good man, but I still have to take responsibility. For my reputation. For the band." He took a gulp of his drink. Reira watched him incredulously.

"You're doing this to be _responsible?_" Reira's outrage was obvious. She shook her blonde waves, and looked at Takumi with a disapproving eye. "You are too much."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Takumi asked her coolly, turning for the first time to face her since her tirade. He looked down at her with his slanting dark eyes, long hair flying about almost as messily as Reira's in the wind. She snorted.

"Please. You know exactly what I mean. You don't **love** her okay? I know."

"And what else would you happen to know about me?" Takumi asked softly, a hint of sadness in his voice. Reira looked up at him through her lashes, spiky with tears held back.

"You're too cruel to people who love you Takumi. Don't always push us away."

---

The clock ticked loudly in the room. Nana's breathing was barely audible above the ticking, but the creaking of the door opening drowned it out for a second. Nana Osaki stepped into the room alone. Junko and Kyosuke were long gone, retired to their room after Nana decided to be left alone.

"Hachi." Nana strode towards the bed. Her friend had not yet changed out of her evening gown, donned for the dinner. It was an ice blue dress, knee length, halter-necked and complete with large white jewels glittering in a patter around her collarbones and blue shoes in the same shade with a larger white jewel on top. Nana's ice blue pedicure showed through the peep toe, and it was at that she looked down at, her hair falling slightly out of its up-do into curly tendrils around her face.

"Hachi, talk to me," Nana urged her former roommate. She shook her slightly.

"Oh Nana, what am I going to do?" Nana K. burst out then dissolved into tears, sobbing on her friend's shoulder. Nana O. patted her head comfortingly.

"Look Hachi, tell me something honestly," Nana O. asked gently, and Nana K. sat up, sniffing, and drying her eyes with a tissue. "Hachi, are you happy?" she continued, concerned. Nana K. stopped sniffing, and paused to think. _Am I really happy?_ She had to ask herself. _All along I've been asking for a second chance, and now I've got it. I have to make the right decision, so I don't hurt anyone anymore._

"Hachi? Really. Are you honest-to-God, living your happily ever after, in that house with a yard?" Nana O. tried asking again. Nana K. looked up at her best friend. Her brown eyes were damp.

"Nana, back then, when I was sleeping with Takumi, I loved him. He was the guy I dreamed of, someone I worshipped for being in your world. He let me dream along. But with Nobu… It's was real. I fell for him because he's a genuinely good person, a great guy who really cared about me. But Nana, I got pregnant." She looked over at Satsuki. "I'm not saying I blame Satsuki for why I chose Takumi, why I had to let go of Nobu. **I** decided that on my own. For the sake of my child. It is his child. Is it selfish of me to go after what I want now, and ruin her world?" Nana K. asked, upset. "I'm so confused Nana! Nothing's changed! I'm still confused, and torn between two choices. Right, and wrong," she sobbed, and looked back down again. Nana O. forced her to look up.

"Look Hachi, it's not your fault. People make choices everyday. It's just a matter of finding out what you really **want**. What makes you happy? Satsuki is old enough to understand now. She will never blame you. And there is no right and wrong. Either way, it's a decision for the best." Nana K. dropped her hands from her face. She looked up at her best friend.

"Then I've made my choice," she murmured softly.

---

Takumi slipped his hotel card into the shaft, and withdrew it when the light turned silently green. He smoothly opened the door soundlessly, and closed it with a small _snap_. Turning around, he jumped ever so slightly at the sight of his wife sitting on the double bed, watching his quiet return.

"Nana, what are you doing up? It's late," he said with a smile, heading into the bathroom. The door to his daughter's room was closed, and he was surprised, but nevertheless, continued to take off his formal clothes and don a bathrobe.

"Want to come in with me?" he asked Nana, who shook her head.

"I need to talk to you," she said, face pale and slightly tired. She sighed and adjusted her position on the bed.

"Sure. What's the problem?" he asked, sitting down heavily beside her. He proceeded to try to untie the ribbon tied together at the back of her dress, when she moved away violently and stood up. Takumi sat up surprised.

"Well, what's wrong? You do seem jumpy. Is it serious?"

"Takumi," she said, her hands gripping her dress violently, "I want a divorce." She closed her eyes.

---

_**N.B. **__Phew. I hope this goes well :D Review pretty please )_


	9. Chapter VIIII: Loose Ends

**LOOSE ENDS**

_**N.B. **__It's so nice to know I have one dedicated reader :) Yes, __**emir**__, DIVORCE! Haha. Wonder what Takumi would do about that if it really happened OO Thanks for reviewing._

_---_

There was a soft knock on the door. With the wind blowing in her ears, she didn't hear at first, until the knocked continued knocking repeatedly ascending in volume until she realized, ultimately, that someone was knocking. Reira set down her glass on the table on the balcony, and walked towards the door quickly. She opened it cautiously, and stood back, shocked, as she saw Shin standing there. He filled the doorway, tall, broad and blonde. He lowered his head and asked, "Can I come in?"

Reira stared at him for about five seconds, before shaking herself and nodding. He closed the door softly behind him and then leant against it. Reminders of previous visits flashed across her mind's eye quickly, one after the other. _It was so much simpler then._ The ever-present Vivienne Westwood lighter was swinging from his neck, glinting in the light. It swung back and forth and reminded Reira of hypnosis. She shook herself.

"How can I help you little Shin?" she asked softly. He closed the door swiftly behind him and in the light draft Reira felt goose bumps appear up and down her arms. She instinctively hugged herself and followed Shin to the bedroom.

"It's not 'little Shin' anymore, I'm way taller than you," he replied, his back facing her. She chuckled softly as he turned and leant against the bar.

"Well why are you here?" Reira repeated, sobering up. She could not afford to let her guard down. Shin ruffled his hair, looking at his feet.

"I've been thinking a lot. And it's just hit me." Shin left off, but peered at Reira through his eyelashes. She was looking expectantly back at him.

"Yes?" she probed, laughing inside at his shyness. _We're so alike, the two of us_, she thought reminiscently of old times.

"Well, it was really Nobu who made me really think: what makes me happy? Well playing bass makes me happy, making the music I love with people I love. Nobu and Hachiko being together make me happy. Nana and Ren, Yasu, everyone being my family makes me happy. But something else used to make me happy too. And it was taken away." Shin dropped his head at the end of his short monologue. Reira was distinctly aware that something was going to happen.

Shin walked over to her, head still bent. He leant over, as if to hug her, but did not extend his arms around her. She could hear his rhythmic breathing, and smell the scent of his cologne and the lingering aroma of the Blast cherry cigarettes he smoked.

"That was you," he whispered softly, and Reira threw her arms around him, her eyes pressed shut with tears. But then she suddenly remembered something, and she leant back against his now encircling arms.

"But Takumi."

---

Meanwhile, back in their room, Takumi was pacing up and down. Nana sat stock-still on the bed, hands still gripping her dress and eyes following her husband's march around the room. He turned to her once in a while, and then resumed his pacing. Finally he stopped.

"Why now?" he asked simply. That was the way Takumi was, business-like and frank. Nana looked away and replied, "I don't want to continue like this."

"But like what? I don't understand why you'd suddenly just change your mind," Takumi said frustrated. He strode forward to her, then knelt in front of her while grabbing her hands.

"Why did you change your mind?" he asked again, more gently. Nana shook her head violently; eyes closed firmly holding back the tears.

"What about Satsuki? Did you ever think about her? What will she think? How will she grow up properly in this kind of environment without a father?" he questioned, not letting up. Nana's eyes snapped open.

"She **will** have a father," she said quietly. Then she stood up to face Takumi. "I don't know how to say this Takumi," she started softly. "I'm sorry for all the trouble it will cause. But I can't live with you, the way you are." Nana rushed out of the room, tears cascading down her face. Takumi stood there, troubled, as the door closed with a small _click_.

---

The next day was bright and sunny. The daylight shone brilliantly through the windows of the hotel, piercing through gaps in curtains and awakening some. Nana O. stirred in her warm bed, made even warmer by the sleeping form next to her, who was now, officially her husband. She looked at his sleeping face, and hugged his head closer to her, and he instantly snuggled down her bosom and held her tighter. She stroked his head and giggled. _Good boy_, she thought cheekily. She glanced out the window, and saw the sunlight basking its glow down. _Day one, married_. She looked back down at Ren, and gently touched the padlock he wore around his neck, bound there forever by her. Suddenly, she remembered Hachi, and then she eased herself away from Ren and got dressed silently, kissing him on the forehead before leaving the room.

In the corridor, she wondered where Nana could be. _She couldn't be with Takumi, could she?_ Nana went down in that direction however, but tapped on the door before their room. As she expected, Nana K. opened the door, with a stirring Satsuki still sleepily lazing on her bed. Nana K. hugged Nana O., her eyes red, and Nana O. gently stroked her hair.

"Hachi, it's okay. Everything's alright," she soothed, closing the door and walking her to the bed. She set her down on it and hurriedly grabbed a tissue box.

"Listen Hachi, you did it right? Please tell me you went through," Nana O. asked worriedly. But Nana K. nodded, blowing her nose and smiled through her tears. Then she wiped the tears away and said softly, "But I haven't told her yet."

Nana O. turned discreetly to look at Satsuki, who was now in the toilet brushing her teeth, and turned back to her friend. "Look, just explain it carefully. She'll understand."

"You think so?" Nana K. asked doubtfully. "I don't know if she can forgive me."

"I'll do it with you, she'll listen," Nana O. said supportively. _We can do anything together._

---

In his room, Nobu was walking up and down, wondering what would happen next. He debated about going to find Nana K., and instead decided to find Shin to ask his advice. When he finished dressing, he proceeded to Shin's room, and knocked loudly on the door. No answer. He persisted, but after 5 minutes of banging, he was told by a very shy maid that he might wake the other guests, then he desisted and walked away embarrassed. As he walked along the corridor, a door opened suddenly on his left and he jumped out of his skin, expecting to see Nana K. However, Yasu's shiny bald head greeted him.

"Yas-san! You freaking scared me to death," he ranted at the drummer, who smiled in return.

"Looking for Hachi?" Yasu asked as they walked companionably down towards the café for breakfast. Nobu nodded and said, "I'm not sure if I should disturb her yet though." Yasu nodded his agreement. "She might still be sleeping."

The sat down in the quiet café, and ordered some food. Nobu picked at his eggs, while Yasu sipped his coffee.

"Why aren't you eating properly," Yasu asked. Nobu smiled and replied, "I'm just wondering what she's going to say."

"Well, have faith. You'll know soon," he added, looking at the café entrance. Nana O. and Nana K. were standing there with Satsuki, who headed over, smiling happily at the sight of them. She launched herself at Yasu, who thankfully, had finished his coffee and caught her steadily.

"Yasu!" Satsuki exclaimed happily, hugging him hard. She turned ad gave a stunning smile to Nobu, who patted her head. Both Nanas approached the table smiling. Nana K. hung behind Nana O. however, but Nana O. grabbed her hand and led her along to the table. Nana K. looked at Nobu hesitantly, but he smiled and offered her a seat next to him which she took. Nana O. sat down next to Nana K. and talked animatedly to her god-daughter.

"Satsuki, do you want to see the buffet? We can all get something to eat," she proposed, and Satsuki nodded delightedly.

"Okay! Let's go Uncle Yasu!" she grabbed both their hands and danced them off to the buffet line. Nana K. and Nobu were left at the table alone. Nana watched her daughter walk away, and smiled at her excitement. Nobu looked at Satsuki too, and smiled at the tiny girl who was tugging on Yasu's arm.

"I will love her as my own," he said softly, and Nana turned to look at him. She gave him a smile, and promised, "You'll have your own too." The sunlight shone down on their entwined hands, rainbows reflecting off the pink diamond.

---

_**N.B. **__Well, hope you guys like this! I've been reading Nana, and am surprised that some of the things I wrote came out in the real story too! I was pretty happy. Hope you like this chapter :) Sorry it took ages to update; I am way too lazy. Reviews might motivate me though haha! _


	10. Chapter X: Hearts On Their Sleeves

**FOOLS WEAR THEIR HEARTS ON THEIR SLEEVES**

_**N.B. **__Hey you guys, I finally got motivated to write again. To be honest, I actually only started writing this fan fiction because I was waiting for the anime to come out. I only ever bought the books, and never read the manga online. I don't even really like reading it online, so I wait for the books, and get bored. I'll try my best to continue this. I'm so happy people still read my work! Thanks so much to __**juleenademon**__**emir and thinking-about-it**__ for reviewing :)_

Takumi leant on the wooden railing of his balcony, sniffing the fresh sharp tang of sea air. Cries of seagulls rang out over the sound of the waves crashing on the beach, the people splashing and having fun on the beach. Takumi was always damaged. He knew that. He was screwed up, bad news; an asshole. He was a player, he used women and he was selfish. Career would always come first. Without music, what would he be? _Nothing,_ he thought to himself. _You'll be nothing._

For once in his life, Takumi wanted to do something for himself. When she stepped into her life, this immature childish girl, Nana, one who everyone loved, he fell in love too. _Love is not the answer to this pain I feel,_ he stubbornly tried to reason with himself. _Then what is?_ He demanded of himself. He probed further, stirring up feelings which were long buried away. _Will I just let her go?_ The one thing that has made me change, that has made me love. That has given me a child, who is nothing like I was. _Everything I should've been_.

Takumi looked up, his sunglasses shading his eyes as usual. He stared up at the sun, looked at it hard for as long as he could, and felt the pain in his eyes. He looked down and when he looked out to the beach once more, he saw bright blinding spots in front of him, like miniscule suns. He blinked hard, and felt something fall onto his arm. A tear.

"So… Nobu is your boyfriend?" Satsuki's head was tilted to one side, eyes wide.

"Well, would you be alright with that?" Nobu asked awkwardly. He rubbed his spiky hairdo, and then looked to Nana K. for support.

"Satsuki, do you understand what we're trying to say here?" Nana asked desperately. It was vital she understood, but talking to a six year old about divorce was definitely complicated. "What I'm trying to say is, I can't live with your father anymore." Satsuki looked at her mother worriedly.

"What's wrong? Is it because he's never around?"

"It's more than that Satsuki. But would you be alright with that? We'd move, and we would live with Nobu instead. Do you understand? You can tell me what you want," Nana tried explaining as simply as possible. Nana O. laid a hand on her shoulder.

"Satsuki, your mother is leaving your father. You will not live with him, but you will still see him as often as you like. Nobu will be your new daddy. That's what mommy's trying to say. How do you feel about this?" Nana O. knelt in front of her god-daughter and peered into her face. "Hmm?"

Satsuki stood still and looked at all three of them individually. They all held their breath, meeting her gaze steadily. She looked at her mother the longest and the last, and Nana K. gave her a small smile, face pinched with worry. Then Satsuki gave a big smile. 

"If it makes you happy mommy, then I'll be happy too!" She exclaimed, and hugged her mother. Nana K. felt a huge weight roll off her chest. She embraced her daughter tightly, and breathed in the warm scent of her child's head. Nobu's arm was around her tightly, cradling both of them while Nana O. watched on smiling.

Reira blinked in the soft sunlight streaming through the shears. Her eyes gradually adjusted to the light, and she lay still, aware of the still sleeping form beneath her. She raised her hand to the sunlight, and looked at the sudden reddish glow of her hand. Blood running through her veins, her heart pumping oxygen to her brain, her chest rising up and down. Just like Shin's. She traced a lazy pattern on his chest, the sunlight still causing her hand to glow bright. Then she propped herself up slowly to watch him sleep. His hair was messily stylish, the blond locks falling artistically into his eyes. Reira smiled and tapped his nose lightly with her index finger, causing him to squint his eyes a little then breathe out heavily.

Reira enjoyed his company while she could. She had never forgotten him. Was it possible that they could still be together? The time was never better now. They had waited long enough. _He can only hold me back for so long_.

She got up quietly and dressed quickly for breakfast, then exited the room softly. Shin opened his eyes. He stayed in bed a while, breathing in the scent of Reira's skin on her pillow. The smell of her hair. He breathed in deeply. It had been a while. Shin looked out of the window at the blue, blue sky. Eventually, he too got up, and got dressed for breakfast.

Yasu stood on the deck, smoking. He wore comfortable clothes, a loose shirt, cargo pants, so different from the high powered lawyer image he always seemed to be. Sunglasses still covered his eyes, and his many piercings glittered in the sun.

"What do you think is going to happen?" Ren asked, staring out at the sea. Yasu did not turn his head to answer, but stared ahead as well.

"Who knows? Only Takumi can say. From what you tell me, it doesn't seem as if she was just another woman to him," Yasu replied, exhaling. Ren nodded, his ripped shirt fluttering in the wind. He looked to the right, where the hotel balconies could be seen and spotted a lone figure with dark sunglasses staring out into the sea. He nodded in that direction and Yasu paused from taking a puff, and turned to look as well.

They watched as the tiny figure smoked and drank, despite the earliness of the morning. Then he went back inside. Yasu turned and looked at Ren, who looked at him in turn.

"This is not going to be good," he said.

The cab screeched to a halt outside an apartment building, and Nana Komatsu hurried up the stairs. She rang the doorbell for one of the apartments, and the door buzzed open.

"You're looking good," Jun said as she opened the door. "So what is this urgent news?" Nana sat down and accepted the cup of tea that Kyosuke had poured for her. She took a hesitant sip, minding the heat, and then set it back down again, still playing with it. Jun and Kyosuke exchanged glances. Fidgets never bade well for Nana. They steeled themselves.

"What is it Nana?" Kyosuke tried gently. Nana's eyes filled up, and she exclaimed, "Takumi's not going to go through with it!" Jun was startled.

"Why not?" She demanded, leaning forward with a frown. Nana shook her head helplessly. "When did he say this?"

"He didn't. He left a note, this morning. I saw it when I sent Satsuki off to school. He said he wasn't going to divorce. And he wants to talk about it. Tonight. After their recording. What do I do Jun?!" Nana burst into a fresh flood of tears. Kyosuke grabbed their handy box of tissues.

"I'm sure he just wants to talk about the custody of Satsuki," he started but Jun interrupted.

"Why would he want to take care of her? He has a tough, demanding job, and although he can provide, only Nana can take care of her the way she's been doing. She's a great mother," Jun argued reasonably. She shook her head, thinking. "There's something else to this. You've been with Takumi for so long; did you really think that he'd never get attached to you?" She asked Nana.

Nana blew her nose and looked up at Jun. "He does treat me well. I don't deny that. And I was happy. Sometimes. But what are you saying Jun?" Jun shook her head at her clueless friend.

"I'm SAYING he's in LOVE with you. Did you really think it wasn't possible?" Jun said, looking up to the heavens as if to ask for divine help in explaining the obvious to her blur friend. Kyosuke lit a cigarette, and then tapped the ash into the ashtray absent mindedly. Nana's nose had stopped running, then she looked at Jun.

"Takumi only ever married me because of Satsuki. Because I got pregnant. That's all it's ever been to me. To be honest, I did it because it was my responsibility. You know that." Nana took a sip of tea. Jun watched her.

"Nana, do you really think that's all?" Nana set down her cup again slowly, and met the eyes of friend.

"He's a player Jun. He could never really love me."

Takumi paced around the smoking room of the studio, alone. His short locks hung in his eyes, and he rubbed his head frustrated, while taking long puffs from his cigarette. Passing by the glass window, he saw his reflection in the sun's light: tall, too pale and slightly haggard. His hair no longer veiled his face like in the old days, during Trapnest's early days. The studio producers had finally agreed in allowing him to cut his hair. He was sick of it long anyways. But this hairstyle gave him a strange nostalgia; it was how he had worn it in high school.

He extinguished the now short stick of tobacco in the crystal ashtray, then sat down heavily on the sofa, looking up at the ceiling. The door suddenly opened and Ren stalked in, lighting up. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Takumi, recovered, then closed the door and sat down on the other sofa, smoking noiselessly.

"I heard Hachiko wants a divorce," Ren said into the silence. Takumi looked up and sighed.

"Yes, she does. Your Nobu proposed to her. She's married for God's sake. To me! This is the same thing again, as it was years ago," Takumi let out. He dropped his head back onto the sofa. "This is just irritating," he murmured. Ren tapped his cigarette's ash out carefully.

"So what are you planning on doing?" Ren took another puff. "You can let her go now. You can do whatever you want, our image won't take a hit. We're stable. Nobody is forcing you to take her back." Takumi sat up, ran his hands through his hair, then stood up.

"We should get back, they'll be waiting for us," he answered.

"Takumi," Ren started, but was cut off. Takumi had paused at the door, and looked back at Ren.

"I have no intention of letting Nana go. If Nobu wants her, he can come and get her. But I will not let her go without a fight." Ren nodded wordlessly and Takumi walked out of the room, closing the door behind him with a sharp _snap_.

_**N.B. **__Hope you guys enjoyed that :) Tried to make it longer, since I hadn't posted up anything in ages. I saw Nana book 9 today! Am so happy, will buy it tomorrow. It was way thicker than any of the other books. Thanks for reading :)_

He He


	11. Chapter XI: Math Ruins Lives

**MATH RUINS LIVES**

_**N.B. **__Wow, I'm updating! :D Very surprised I got such a fast review, thank you __**HotIceRed**__ :) Trying to make a good habit of updating, but my brain is being squeezed dry thanks to college and university applications!_

Nana Komatsu did what she did every morning. She prepared her daughter's lunch neatly into a pink bento box and cooked breakfast while at it. Today she decided to make some _tamagoyaki_, and they were sizzling in the pan while she packed her daughter's _onigiri_ _ume_ into her lunch box along with some pickles and… _fruit_, thought Nana. She went to the vegetable crisper and looked quickly at their selection. _Apples…_ No. They'd turn brown by the time she opened up her lunch box, and Satsuki wouldn't eat them. _Oranges?_ They'd dry out probably. _What about watermelon? _Wait, they're dry out too. _We're out of bananas._

Nana moved the boxes of fruits around, then saw a red box. She smiled and took it out, removed a few of the ripe red fruits and put them into the last empty section of the lunch box. She added a little whipped cream to the side of them, and covered the lunch box carefully while still smiling. _Strawberries._ Nana's favourite. Nana K. never forgot anything about those that mattered to her. She moved back to the stove, removed the three rolls of _tamagoyaki_, placing them on plates and setting three place settings on the dining table.

"Mom, is breakfast ready?" Satsuki called from her room.

"Yes, it's waiting for you on the dining table," Nana replied while chopping some tomatoes that she had gotten from Junko. Her daughter appeared suddenly, and stole a slice. While still munching, she strolled over to the refrigerator and poured herself a generous glass of orange juice to go with her eggs. In a short while, she was calling her goodbyes to her mother, grabbing her lunch box and leaving for school.

Nana finished up chopping the apples and arranged them daintily on a willow patterned plate. She went to the refrigerator and poured out two glasses of juice as well. As she was placing these on the table, a voice exclaimed suddenly.

"Oh my God, you woke up early and prepared breakfast!" Nobu said excitedly. He sat down enthusiastically, and Nana laughed at him.

"I had to prepare her off for school anyways, but why are you so happy about it?" She asked, sitting down opposite him.

"It's just, it's been a while since I've tasted your cooking," Nobu replied while digging in. "THIS IS AWESOME!" Nana smiled at him over the rim of her glass.

"Well, you'll have more opportunities to taste my cooking now," she said to him. Nobu stuffed a tomato enthusiastically into his mouth and smiled at her. "I'll love every moment of it." He held out his hand to her, and she put hers in it. That simple gesture reminded them of such simple times, back when everything was uncomplicated and when they were happy. But they had come too far now to give up. They wouldn't. Nothing could break this.

In the toilet of the recording studio, Nana Osaki replayed moments of the past few weeks.

"_You've got a major world tour lined up! You've been doing many regional tours and a few national ones, but Gaia has decided it's time to take the plunge. The stadiums are all booked, you guys are leaving soon!" Ginpei had exclaimed. Shin and Nobu exclaimed excitedly and whooped. Yasu kept his cool as usual while she had screamed along and ran around excitedly._

"_When do we leave?!" she asked._

"_A month! So get ready guys! We've got to do this. You guys are it! Trapnest never made it this far! So you've got to hold the record for this. Give it your best!"_

Fast forward.

"_You're going on a world tour?" Ren asked, one chopstick dropping. "We just got MARRIED!" _

"_Well, Ginpei says it's time for it. We have an INTERNATIONAL fan base now. I'm not giving this up!" she had replied. She picked up her dishes and placed them in the sink. "I can't wait for this!" _

"_Well, I'm happy for you," Ren said, joining her at the sink. He wrapped his arms around her from behind and breathed in the scent of her hair. "I wish you didn't have to leave though. I should chain you to the bed and never let you go!"_

"_As if anything could chain me!" she had replied cheekily. He patted her as he went back to the room._

"_You never know."_

Fast forward.

_Nobu's head was bowed, and he looked moodily at his shoes. "Cheer up Nobu," Shin said encouragingly. "We'll be back soon enough. Hachi will be fine."_

"_I'm just worried about what Takumi might do," Nobu had replied. Nana looked at him hard._

"_He can't do anything now. What we need to do, is SELL. Be psyched! We should bring Hachi along actually!" she said suddenly, inspired._

"_Haha, Ginpei would never allow it," Yasu said while tapping his snare. "Nobu would be too occupied with her." _

Fast forward. Forwardforwardforward.

"Bleargh!" The toilet flushes. She sits down on it, shaking slightly, a cold sweat breaking out on her forehead. She ran her hands through her hair, closed her eyes to concentrate on holding down her nausea. She crossed over to her bag in the room and looked at the little circle of pills. She put them down, and then took out a plastic bag from her handbag.

Forwardforwardforward.

_A little red cross. A little red cross which screwed up her life her plans all gone down the drain fuck fuck FUCK how could this have HAPPENED?_

She hurled it across the room. It clattered against the wall noisily but she took no notice. She sank down to her knees, eyes wide and hands clutching at her hair. She held herself and rocked back and forth on her heels, staring at nothing, only thoughts going through her head randomly, quickly and in a blur.

_This can't be happening, this can't be happening, this can't be happening._ The mantra pounded on and on, over and over in her head, repeating itself, resounding loudly and with each repetition, she grew more panicked.

_What do I do, what do I do, what the FUCK DO I FUCKING DO? _

Tears filled her eyes, and it was only then did she realize she was shouting, out loud, to nobody in particular. Nana stopped rocking back and forth, then stood up and walked to stare in the mirror at her reflection. Black trails of mascara ran down her face, while her eyes were huge, dark and burning. She continued staring for a minute, then turned on the water and washed her face clean.

Nana didn't hurry. She washed up, then dried off, then walked to her mobile phone, which was lying on the bed. She pressed a button, then pressed call.

Fifteen minutes later, she was sitting in a little café, wearing her dark sunglasses, trademark stockings and combat boots and an oversized striped sweater dress. Her Vivienne Westwood ring sparkled in the late afternoon sunlight. The silver was worn, the edges rounded and smooth to the touch. That ring was part of her, never seen without it; as permanent as the lotus flower tattooed on her arm. She tapped her cigarette, and took another pull. The coffee in front of her was black, a strawberry cake lay half eaten. The whipped cream was inviting. Nana placed her cigarette habitually onto the ashtray, lifted her finger and scooped a bit off. The sharp sweet tang of it was welcoming on her tongue. She licked her fingers, and picked up the honey coated strawberry, licking off the gel and biting into it. A tiny bell tinkled.

Yasu sat down opposite her and watched her devour her strawberry.

"Coffee, black," he said in reply to the waiter's unasked question, who nodded and headed off, returning with a cup of black coffee. Yasu waited till he had left.

"Nana. What's wrong?" he brought out a pack of cigarettes too, Blast cherry flavoured as always. Nana bent her head. Yasu leant forward and placed a hand on her arm.

"Nana," he said softly, squeezing her arm slightly. She didn't look up, but stared at his long fingers; the large stone ring; the scorpion engraving. Then she looked up at him, feeling tears prick her eyes.

"Yasu," she barely whispered, her voice hoarse and shaky. Yasu stubbed out his stick, then held her arm more firmly, worried. Nana bent her head and started sobbing quietly into her hands. Yasu dumped some money on the table, then successfully got Nana to get up and go outside.

They walked along to a quieter place, near a park. Nana had stopped crying, but was still determinedly not looking up or making eye contact with anyone. Yasu stopped suddenly and turned to her, hands on her hands which were encircling herself.

"Nana. What is it?" She looked at him finally.

"I'm pregnant."

_**N.B. **__Well… What do you think?_


	12. Chapter XII: Unintentional Placebo

**UNINTENTIONAL PLACEBO**

_**N.B. **__Haha, yes __**HotIceRed**__, I mention you yet __**again!**__ I agree, a Ren and Nana baby would be the ultimate punk rocker child. Plus, you read my mind ;) Also, thanks to __**emir**__, glad you're still reading! Yes it was a few days ago :) The effect of positive feedback. Aaah. My fellow fan fiction writer __**freakochicko**__ agrees that reviews motivate people so much more. Thank you for checking my updates so quickly xD It brings tears to my eyes TT_

"I'm pregnant."

Yasu stood stock still, hands still on Nana's, his friend, his little sister. He had tried to protect her but in the end he couldn't. He looked down at her. Her head was bowed and tears flowed freely down her cheeks. Her eyes were screwed up.

"Nana, aren't you on the pill?" he asked, remembering Ren's complaints.

"_I wouldn't mind having kids… It's just that Nana. She doesn't want anything to get in the way of her singing. I told her she can still have kids and sing, but she said it'd be different."_

Yes. Ren had said that. What was odd was…

"Nana, do you have your pills with you?"

Five minutes later they were in standing in Ren's apartment. Yasu stood at the huge bay window, looking at the sea glittering in the early morning sun. He reached for his packet of Blast, then remembered, and stopped regretfully. He wondered vaguely if Ren could stop smoking while Nana was pregnant. _If_ _she keeps the baby,_ he reminded himself. He felt an unexplainable discomfort thinking about the words _Nana, Ren, baby, keep?_

It was an almost-but-not-quite-I'm-going-to-hurl kind of feeling.

And also I'm–confused-and-sort-of-scared.

Yasu was unfamiliar with these feelings. He was the type who was always sure, was always certain, always knew what had happened, what was happening and what was going to happen. It was unfamiliar for him not to know what to do. Feelings. They complicate everything. The situation was simple. Nana is pregnant. Ren wants kids. Nana doesn't because she wants to sing, so she can abort. The feelings came in where Ren probably would not forgive Nana if she aborted his child, or how Nana would feel if she were to have to. Yasu bent his head and looked at his feet.

Nana being abandoned as a child by her mother had given her a harsh outlook on the world. Surely she would not condemn her own child to that sort of life, or give up her child at all like that. He knew she would think she was betraying her own convictions and what she had promised herself. Yasu heard a rattling sound, and shook himself out of his reverie. He turned and saw Nana approaching him quietly. She held out the pills to him and he took them, lifting them up for closer inspection. Finding nothing wrong, he put them into his coat pocket. That would come later.

Nana watched Yasu and then sighed. She looked so vulnerable right then to him. Her feet were bare, with black nail polish on them. She cradled herself. She had changed into a black spaghetti top and leopard print shorts when she got back.

"Yasu… What should I do?" the helplessness of her voice shocked him. Yasu looked at her worriedly.

"Relax. Drink more grapefruit juice. Actually I'll go get that right now, you stay here okay?" She nodded quietly. "Go lie down; I'll be back really quick. And no smoking," he added. He watched her retreat to the room she shared with Ren.

Out on the sidewalk, Yasu took out the pills again. Nana had not missed a day at all, she had assured him. There was of course, that risky percentage, as the pill itself was not 100 percent assured. However…

"Oh, these are odd. This is extremely odd," said the pharmacist. He set down the pills. "Where did you get these?" he enquired, looking Yasu up and down through his glasses. The bald man wearing frameless glasses was evidently not happy. His white lab coat was impeccable and he smoothed it down as he waited for Yasu's answer.

"They belong to a good friend of mine who is pregnant. What is so odd?" he asked. The pharmacist picked up the pills and passed it to Yasu for inspection.

"I'll start from the beginning. Contraceptive pills come in packs of 21 and 28 day packs. Women are supposed to take the pills for 21 days, during which time they will not menstruate until the 7 day break in which they should menstruate. After that, they continue taking the pill normally and repeat the process. For the 28 day pack, you do not stop at all, as the last 7 pills are actually sugar pills; pills just there so that women do not get out of the habit of taking the pill everyday," the pharmacist explained patiently. Yasu nodded.

"So, my friend is taking the 28 day pack. What is so curious? That means she takes one every day, and she has confirmed she has never missed one once." The pharmacist took the packet back from Yasu and flipped it over.

"Do you see how these last 7 pills are coloured? This is so the women know which ones are not the real pill. The packet you just gave me to inspect? They're **all** sugar pills."

Nana lay down quietly on the bed, comforter half covering her. She faced the windows, and listened to Ren's alarm clock tick the seconds past. Her hand was resting lightly on her flat taut stomach. She thought she could feel a heartbeat. _I wonder if this was what Hachi felt like_, Nana thought, recalling how upset and emotional her best friend was when she was pregnant. Speaking of her… Nana jumped a little, realizing she hadn't told Hachi anything. Or Nobu. _Or Ren for that matter_, she thought finally, albeit bitterly. _What do I do…_

Nana was in a bind. She wondered if she should abort the baby, then remembered a conversation she had with Hachi after sending Misato off.

"_I mean, if they can't afford to raise it properly or be good parents, then what's the point?" she said aloud, walking down the stairs._

"_Oh, I don't know. Isn't it maternal instinct? Even though you'd be a bad mother, you'd still want to have it and protect it, isn't it?" Hachi had replied worriedly._

_I didn't even know then_, Nana thought sadly. Now the tables had turned. Ren would get the children he always wanted. She wondered vaguely why Yasu had taken her pills, and then unable to fight her exhaustion from her morning sickness and lack of sleep, succumbed to slumber.

"Ren, are you busy right now?" Yasu smoked while on his cell. He was stressed and needed the nicotine.

"Not really darling. What's up?" Ren asked. It was not like Yasu to disturb Trapnest's working hours for something trivial and unimportant.

Yasu breathed out. "I know about the pills," he said. Ren's eyes widened in shock. _How does he know everything?_ He thought, frustrated. He closed his eyes and sighed.

"Ren, I know what you're trying to do."

Ren's eyes snapped open, then devoid of emotion asked blandly, "Oh yeah? What's that?"

"You're trying to stop Nana from singing, from everything. You want to keep her from the world she loves."

_**N.B. **__Sorry guys, this one was shorter I know. Just can't fight the tiredness, its 2:44 AM now TT By the way, I've written a one shot story! Please check it out :) You know I love reviews!_


	13. Chapter XIII: Hash Brownies?

**HASH BROWNIES?**

_**N.B. **__Haha, yes I delight in mentioning my readers here :) It's my way of replying! Master plan? Maybe… Hehe. Glad to see a review from a new reader! Thanks to the both of you, __**HotIceRed **__and __**Amy-Star **__:) Also, thanks a lot to my new reader who reviewed me, __**RandomAznNoobieNeenjazoncrack. **__Phew, that took a while to type. Glad you like the story! And thanks for the Pocky :D____You guys motivate me to write! This update is dedicated to the 3 of you :)_

Ren held the phone tightly to his ear. He stood in the middle of the corridor, head bent, one hand in the pocket of his jeans. _Yes. Maybe I do want to keep her from all that._

"Ren. Are you still there?" Yasu's voice broke through his thoughts.

"Yes, I'm still here." Ren slumped against the wall and slid down till he was resting on his ankles, squatting, head down again and running his hand through his short spiky black hair.

"Yas. I think I'm going crazy," he said softly. Yasu tapped his cigarette and watched the ash fall to the floor and break, soft embers of fire snuffed out in the gentle puff of wind. He waited for Ren to continue.

"I don't know. I know I abandoned her back then. But now… She's taking off, you guys are so big, and I'm getting left behind," he admitted brokenly.

"Ren, you're married. How much more attached do you want her to be to you?" Yasu asked reasonably. "And Nana's not one to be tied down, you know that. We **all** know that."

Ren nodded to himself. "Look Yas, I'll make it plain. She just, she's never mine. I mean, take this for example. When she finds out she's pregnant, the first thing she does is go to you. What about me? I'm the father! Who else could it be? Why not me? Doesn't she trust me?" Ren said frustrated. His fist found the wall hard and came away slightly red. Ren leant his head on the wall, and closed his eyes, close to tears and holding back. His other hand still held the phone. Yasu heard the noises and guessed what was happening.

"Ren. This is not how things happen. You can't do it like this. You shouldn't have done it like this."

"What would you know Baldy? You have no idea; she's part of me but part of everyone else too; I have her but then I don't; she's mine but yet she's NOT!" Ren yelled the last word into the tiny metal contraption which was currently linked to his best friend. He pounded the wall with his fist again. The plaster flaked slightly.

Yasu breathed out a thin stream of smoke. He could hear his best friend half sobbing with frustration and hurt. But Yasu was indifferent to this: Ren had hurt Nana, and Yasu had nothing left to say except -

"You knew this. You decided how it would be when you up and left for Tokyo. When she chose to stay behind. It's bigger than that now Ren. It's about everything. She has too much pride, hurt too much to let you get in the way of her dream."

Ren opened his eyes, slightly red and moist from suppressed tears. "You told me to take it Yasu," he started, but got cut off almost immediately, as if his reply was expected.

"Yes, I told you to take it. Ren, you have talent and you could freaking use it. You knew this too; staying in that town, all your talent would've wasted away. Because you left, you gave Nana the dream of leaving too, and showing the world what she could do."

"So… You're trying to say, it's my fault for leaving to make a better life for myself and to realize my dream and I have to pay for the consequences of Nana not ever fully being able to live with just me?"

"When you didn't ask her to come with you and abandoned her like her mother did, yes Ren. Yes."

"Hey mom."

"Shin-chan!" Nana K. exclaimed happily. She was always happy to receive a call from her surrogate son. She stopped wiping down the floury countertops from her brownie baking and instead leant against them to talk. "What's up? Since you're free now, you should come visit your mother before you guys head off for tour you know."

"I know," Shin said softly into the phone. This voice, this person, this kind hearted soul. He was glad to call her his mother, even though they weren't blood related. Hachi always treated him the way he had wanted to be treated as a child: to be babied, loved and coddled. He had never gotten that. Shin adored it now, and her. "What are you doing mom? How's my sister?" he asked eagerly.

"She's fine, just got back from school and doing homework in front of the television," Nana said, and received a funny face from her daughter. "I've got food for you if you come over now to visit!" she tempted, and Shin laughed delightedly.

"Okay mom, I'll be there soon!" And under half an hour, he was.

"SHIN-CHAN!" Nana shouted excitedly as soon as she flung open the door. She leapt into his arms and embraced him happily and he laughed. Why was she the only person who could make him feel like this? Elated, without having to pay a price? Happiness, without sneaking around, without hiding and shielding from the world? He set her down and followed her into the house, while receiving an equally enthusiastic greeting from his surrogate sister, Satsuki, who had abandoned her homework, wailing.

"Shin! I can't do it, it's too difficult," Satsuki wailed, clinging to Shin's clothes. He laughed and picked her up, walking back to the living room.

"Right, let me help you with that! It's English isn't it?" he asked and she nodded mournfully.

"I don't get it at all! Help me," she said, pulling her puppy dog eyes. Shin laughed again. He wondered how many times he laughed whenever he was with Hachi, or her daughter.

"Here you go!" Nana exclaimed, bringing out a plate of her freshly baked brownies along with glasses of milk for both of her children. She the tray down carefully on the glass tabletop then put out coasters as well. She smiled happily at Shin complimenting her baking and watched both of them devour it happily. Shin's visits were also of great joy to her. It was a time when she could still have fun and be herself, lose herself and not worry at all; just watching them smile was enough.

When Shin had finished helping Satsuki with her homework, and she had excused herself to take a bath, they both sat back with a sigh and smiled at each other contentedly.

"So little Shin, how have you been?" Nana asked softly, putting her hair back behind her ears. She had aged little, Shin thought, over these past six years. _They must've been trying, but she's put on a brave face_. Takumi hadn't made it easy for her to be happy.

"I'm just, confused, mom," he admitted, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. He rested his head on his hands. "I don't know what I can do anymore." Nana leaned forward, concerned. She placed a gentle hand on Shin's leg.

"It's not easy, making choices in life sometimes," she said. "Knowing what you want, that's always the first step. Do you know what you want, Shin?" He looked at her small smile and her soft eyes and nodded.

"I want to stay here with you, and have you look after me," he said. Nana smiled wider and patted his leg softly. "You can stay here as long as you want now," she promised. "Now Takumi's gone, I don't have to listen to anyone. I can be really happy. And I can only do that with you guys by my side."

Shin smiled and leant back against the couch, feeling relieved. He felt odd, but it was not a bad feeling. Instead, it made him feel happy and good. They chatted a bit more and laughed, unaware that miles away, a best friend and a band member was having a nervous breakdown; or that a soon-to-be-ex husband was sitting in a hotel bathroom, having a bath with heavy thoughts on his mind. They laughed and made merry; making the most of what they had before the events that were coming ahead, or the feelings, choices and consequences that were to be felt, made and dealt with.

Nobu came home at dinner time, after spending a day in his apartment packing the essentials. He had also brought home an unexpected gift of flowers, to which Nana squealed and immediately plunked into a vase of water. Their light scent invaded the house, and was soon overpowered by the aroma of good home cooked food. A little family of four, having a meal. Nobu, Nana, Shin and Satsuki. It was one of their happiest times so far.

As Shin left, calling replies to his mother's woeful goodbyes, he remembered how he had felt earlier when Nana had laughed and patted his leg. His elation. His checkered floppy hat and sunglasses shielded him from recognition as he waved down a cab, but didn't shield his surprise from himself.

It was like falling in love.

_**N.B. **__Phew. Finally done :) And up to my limit too! Hope you guys enjoyed that!_


	14. Chapter XIIII: Explaining

**EXPLAINING**

_**N.B. **__I can't tell you how deliriously happy I was when I opened my email and saw three new reviews on the chapter which I posted up THE NIGHT BEFORE. That felt pretty freaking good. Haha! Thanks a lot to__** RandomAznNoobieNeenjazoncrack. **__What's up with the "Kiwi"? Just wondering :) Anyways, I'm really glad you liked this chapter! Your feedback is really interesting; gives me some ideas. And I'll take that Pocky thank you muchly :) I shall munch on it while writing this chapter._

_Thanks also to __**emir**__ and __**HotIceRed**__. You guys are awesome and I really appreciate your support :) Yes, Ren seems to have an evil agenda hehe. I shall now also try to include more Shin parts for you __**HotIceRed**__. Once again, thanks a lot! Love you guys._

_**P.S. **__I noticed that my borders are missing. This really sucks, and I have no idea why they keep disappearing, but bear with it until I find a way! If you guys have a solution, don't hesitate to let me know! Thanks :)_

Nana awoke from a deep but not exactly revitalizing sleep. She sat up and put her hand to her forehead; the posture of despair. Then a sudden nausea swooped down on her and she lurched from the bed in one giant motion and sprang for the toilet bowl. Sweat beaded her forehead as she expelled green bile into the porcelain bowl, closing her eyes and praying for it to be over as fast as possible.

A minute later, after a last couple of dry heaves and some retching, she sat back, leaning against the wall with her eyes closed in exhaustion. _I feel like shit._ The cool touch of the tiles was comforting to her heated and weak body, like diving into the pool on a sweltering hot summer day. It soon revived her and she stood up shakily, holding onto the towel rail for support, flushed the toilet and washed her face and hands with cool clear tap water. After several more splashed, she turned off the water and looked up and unexpectedly into the mirror. She met her own dark eyes, rimmed with bags and worries. Water droplets slid down her face like tears. The gentle _drip drip drip_ was all that she heard in the emptiness. The water seemed to fall as if in slow motion, crashing onto the white tiles below and pooling there. Nana grabbed a towel and dried herself off. Then she headed out to the kitchen in search of nourishment.

She opened the fridge then sighed in disappointment at her boyfriend's lack of caring about his health as it was pretty much full of beer, Perrier water, lemons, some eggs, _edamame_ and nothing much else. She wasn't feeling too hungry, so she grabbed a Perrier and eggs, deciding to make the _tamagoyaki _that Hachi had so lovingly taught her. She grabbed a lemon for the Perrier and closed the refrigerator door. She assembled her breakfast onto the counter, and then decided she wanted a miso soup as well. She grabbed the miso from a cupboard and began cooking. Five minutes later, she lifted the sizzling yellow omelet onto a plate, stirred the small pot of miso feverishly and turned off the fire. She ladled it into a bowl and carried all this to the dining table, on which a glass of Perrier with lemon now sat.

"_Itadekimasu_," she murmured to no one in particular. She looked down at her eggs and took a bite. It was light and fluffy, exactly how Hachi had taught her to do it. It seemed to be missing something though. Then she realized, got up and after a few seconds smiled down at the eggs, on which she had used tomato sauce to draw a silly face. She resumed eating; now smiling. She took a sip of her miso soup, which was, as everyone said, always too salty.

"_Hmm, I love your miso! So salty," Ren said._

Nana reminisced and regretted it as it brought on a wave of sadness. Ren. She did not leave her hometown for this; to be his little wife at home. Now it seemed to be all she was destined to be.

Nobu, Shin and Yasu waited at the studio for Nana to arrive for their rehearsal for their first world tour. Shin was on the floor, sitting, blowing smoke rings into the air. Yasu was at his drum kit, while Nobu was sitting on the stage, strumming softly on his guitar.

"Where's Nana? It's not like her to be late at all," Shin commented, turning to Yasu for an explanation. Yasu looked up at the both of them.

"She might not be coming today; she's not feeling well," Yasu said, whipping out his cell. "I'll give her a ring."

"What? If you knew she wasn't feeling well, why did you ask us to come?!" Nobu said exasperated that he was losing time with Hachi. He started zipping up his guitar as Yasu called. Shin stayed where he was, watching Yasu. There was still no answer.

"Ah, Nana. Are you feeling okay?" Yasu said, relieved. "You're coming today? No? You should stay at home then. Okay, maybe I'll come by later. Okay." He hung up.

"What did Nana-san say?" Shin asked, strumming his bass. Yasu looked at the both of them, Nobu now not moving to listen to how his friend was.

"Well, actually, we've got a small problem," Yasu said, rubbing the back of his neck. "Nana is, well. She's pregnant."

Shin rang the doorbell. He heard a patter of feet, and then Hachi pulled the door open loudly.

"Welcome home!" she called, smiling happily. Shin and Nobu both gave her half smiles and proceeded inside.

"Hmm, you guys are back early," she said, looking at them both for an explanation. They were both strangely quiet, which was not normal. "What's up?"

"Let's talk inside," Nobu said with a small smile, ushering her inside. Nana complied, but worriedly. It wasn't like Nobu to be so serious unless there was something big going on. However, she headed inside the kitchen and brought out refreshments. When she headed out to the living room, Nobu and Shin were both sitting down silently. She set the tray down, concerned.

"What's wrong?" she asked hesitantly, looking from one to the other. They both looked up hesitantly, then looked at each other uncertainly.

"Well," Nobu started, then stopped and looked awkwardly at Shin. They were both worried how Nana would react to the news. They had been shocked when Yasu had told them, and now they were pretty sure that she would be shocked too.

"_Nana is, well. She's pregnant." _

Those words still echoed around their heads.

"Mom, something's happened," Shin said to Nana. She looked at Nobu, who nodded his head and sat up heavily.

"Yasu only just told us. We cancelled practice, that's why we're back so early," he explained. Hachi nodded.

"Tell me."

"Nana's pregnant," Shin said bluntly. Nana wasn't sure she heard correctly, and looked at confusedly at Nobu for confirmation. He nodded.

"Oh my God," was all she said. "How is she? But how did she get pregnant? She's always been on the pill!" Questions poured out and she demanded answers. Shin and Nobu wasn't sure how she'd react to the news.

"_If you're going to tell Hachi, tell her carefully. We're not sure how she might react, but she'll probably want to go to see Nana."_

Yasu had warned them.

"Well, it's, complicated," Nobu said carefully. "Ren planted fake ones instead." Nana's eyes widened.

"He MADE her get pregnant?!" she shouted, half on her feet.

"Mom!" Shin protested, and crossed to sit next to her and make her sit down again. He put an arm around her shoulders. "Nana doesn't know yet, so keep it down," he said softly. "And we don't want Satsuki to know do we," he added. Nana nodded, and then looked at the both of them again.

"Are you going to tell her?" she asked nervously. Nobu and Shin looked at each other and shrugged.

"Yasu's going to do that," Nobu said and he slumped back against the sofa.

"What about the tour?" Nana asked again, looking at Shin this time.

"I don't know. It all depends on Nana. What if she wants to keep it? We'll only find out later. Yasu's probably there now. So we wait."

Yasu stood outside Ren's apartment, finished a cigarette. He leant back against the wall and sighed. _What have you done, Ren?_ He thought, irritated. He had to be the big brother and tell Nana. Did he? Yasu didn't know. His hand paused above the doorbell. He dropped the cigarette, stepped on it and sighed one last time.

_Ding dong._

_**N.B.**__ That was a hard chapter to write. Took me a few days, and I got one more review from __**Amy-Star**__ again! Thanks a lot for your support guys :)_


	15. Chapter XV: I Don't Know

**I DON'T KNOW**

_**N.B. **__Woah, I think that was the longest time within these few stories to update huh? It's been almost a week right? Sorry people, exams are coming up and I'm waiting for my university to get back to me / But your reviews are awesomely inspiring :) Thanks to __**HotIceRed**__, who seems to be a frequent reviewer, and for that I thank you! __**angeleyes20876, Amy-Star **__and __**JacinthX**__, thank you muchly too :) I agree with you __**Amy-Star,**__ being pregnant like that must suck. Anyways, you guys keep the story going._

_Ding dong._

The bell echoed through the house, invisible sound waves rebounding off the surfaces of the walls and floor; ringing ever so slightly even after the initial sound had gone. It startled Nana awake; making her jump and finally crease the covers which were exactly the same as how she had put them on herself before she fell asleep. She got out of the bed awkwardly, moving slowly as she had been lying on her side the whole while, which had brought on a numbness she couldn't notice in sleep, and felt the aftermath of when she tried getting up. Fire shot down her right arm and leg, the blood gushing back into the places she had been resting her weight on. Nana winced, and walked to the door, flinching at the cold touch of the white tiled floor.

"Who is it?" she called through the door, her voice hoarse. She was too tired and blur from sleep to look through the fish eye.

"It's me," said Yasu's familiar voice. Nana withdrew the latch, unlocked the door and opened it to reveal Yasu; tall, bald and as usual, wearing sunglasses. _Something's missing_, Nana thought. _Oh wait, nope, there it is_. She had spotted the tell tale flecks of ash on the floor, and the crushed black stub. She wished she could light one up herself.

"What's up?" Nana asked, as Yasu stepped in. He headed over to the kitchen, grabbed some water for both of them, and joined her in the sitting room. Yasu handed her the water, which she accepted gratefully and sipped at, while he took the other couch.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, concerned. Nana's smile was brittle, as well as her mutter of _fine_. He smiled uneasily and leant forward.

"Are you going to keep the baby?" he asked her. Nana looked at the cup in her hands.

"I don't know," she replied, looking at the ripples in the water of her glass. "Ren doesn't know yet. Well, I didn't tell him yet. Did you?"

"I did," Yasu replied, causing Nana to look up at him suddenly. She said nothing, then asked quietly, "What did you do with my pills?" Yasu was taken aback; he had expected her to ask about Ren's opinion on her pregnancy. He hid it well however, and took out the little packet of pills and slid them towards her.

"I took them to a pharmacist, that's all," he replied. Nana stared down at them.

"What did he say?" she asked, looking up at him. Her dark eyes burned into him, staring into his equally dark sunglasses. She was gripping the glass so tightly, her knuckles were white. Yasu leaned forward and gently pried it out of her grip and set it back gently onto the table top. Nana rubbed her arms and settled on gripping her left arm with her right one.

"Well? Is something wrong with them? Or is something wrong with me? It's not possible; I get those pills from my doctor; the same doctor, exact same prescription and brand-"

"Nana, your pills are fake," Yasu cut her off midway through her rant. She stopped speaking immediately and looked at him hard again.

"What are you saying Baldy?" she asked, her voice as hard as her eyes. Yasu leaned back and crossed his legs. "Ren switched them."

"Hachiko?"

"Yes, it's me."

"How's it going? How is she? Is she okay?"

"She seemed fine all the way here. She was so quiet… I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to say anything inappropriate."

"That was a good choice. Where is she now?" 

"With the doctor. I came outside to speak; phone radiation could affect the machines. But the baby is healthy. It's only a few weeks old."

"Did she say anything about, Ren?"

"No Yasu… She didn't. Why did Ren have to do it like this? And at this time too… That tour meant everything to her. Means everything to all of you."

"Relationships are complicated, Hachi. Who knows why Ren had to do it like this? He has his own reasons. We have no idea why. But we know what Ren wanted. Now all we need to know is what Nana wants. Do you have any idea if she's thinking of keeping it?"

"No Yas-san. She didn't say anything at all. I think she's just betrayed. I would be too."

"I understand. I've kept you away long enough. You should go back inside and check up on her. But I'll ring you a bit later; I need to talk to some people. Take care of her."

"Okay, I will. See you later."

Reira sang. She closed her eyes, and listened to the music that Ren had written; written for her to sing to. Lyrics she had written, words which each had their own meaning; words which she had put into sentences with what she thought and felt everyday but never had the guts to say. They poured out of her; loud, clear and strong. She was so strong when she was singing. It was what she knew best, what she could **do** best. The only part of her which she had strived to achieve and improve; without singing she was nothing.

As the song ended, Reira opened her eyes, and found herself looking straight at Takumi, who nodded approvingly and then continued talking to the sound guy. Reira watched him; the man she had secretly loved forever and who was about to be divorced. Was it ever possible to be with him? It had been enough, just to be around him at first. She had followed willingly, done what he said, listened and obeyed. For once, Reira wanted to think about herself.

"Good job today Reira," he told her as they were walking down the corridor to their rooms. She nodded in response. He looked at her briefly.

"Well, good night," Reira said, as she arrived at her room. He nodded and continued down the hall. She slipped in her key card and as the green light flashed, opened the door and moved as if to enter, but instead stayed still and watched Takumi's tall form continue down the corridor. As he reached his room, she went inside hers and closed the door with a soft _thump_.

Five minutes later, she opened the door again. She was wearing just her bathrobe. She pulled him inside, by the collar of his shirt and kissed him hard on the mouth. He responded and they she began walking backwards, leading him into the room; both still kissing fiercely and passionately. He untied the sash of the bathrobe and she let it fall to the ground; while she tugged up his shirt and fumbled at his waist, finally just unclasping his belt. He finished the job for her, pulling them off as quickly as he could and leaving the last breadcrumb trail of clothes they had discarded from the door to the bed. They fell on the bed, wrestling; he on top of her, her hair spread out on the bed in a spray of gold.

Reira wrapped her legs around him, and pulled him closer to her, if that was even possible. He kissed her lips, eyes, and neck and moved down accordingly; one hand was pinning her arm to the bed and the other was snaking a burning trail around her pale slender body. He came back up in line to her head, looking down at her face. His eyes roamed over her, and then locked onto hers. She lifted her free hand and ran her hand through his soft hair, pulling his head down insistently and surprisingly strong to her lips. She could feel his warmth, a little cold sweat down his back as she lightly ran her fingers down it, feeling the tension and the muscles; placing her palms flat on his back and wrapping her legs tighter around him again, forcing him inside.

_This is enough_, she thought, as he kissed her again and she returned the kiss just as passionately. He lightly nipped her neck and she moaned in pain and desire. She just needed to feel his warmth, breathe in his scent and hold him close; feeling him move inside her. Skin to skin. _This is enough_, Reira thought again. _For now._

_**N.B. **__Hope you guys liked that :)_


	16. Chapter XVI: Hiding

**HIDING**

_**N.B. **__Hey guys! I know it's been a while since I've updated. But I've had to revise for exams, so I apologise! I'll resume it as fast as I can. Meanwhile, I'll just churn out this chapter while I procrastinate :P Thanks a lot to __**JacinthX, missgohan**__ and __**Moonlight Usagi-chan**__ for reviews :)_

* * *

Shin lit up his cigarette quietly with his Vivienne lighter. He watched as Reira slept on. _I shouldn't be doing this._ He knew fully where her feelings truly were, and they weren't with him. He sighed inaudibly, and got dressed quickly and silently. _I shouldn't let her depend on me like this._ Shin pulled on his shoes, and took one last look around the room; at the bed; at her sleeping form. Then he left. He closed the door softly behind him and started down the corridor.

"Shin."

Shin stopped in his tracks, shocked. He knew who the voice belonged to. He turned slowly. Takumi was standing in front of his room, the door closing slowly behind him. His short hair was slicked back and his eyes were dark. He strode down the corridor to Shin and then motioned for him to follow him. They walked down the corridor together, side by side; Shin's blonde locks bright beside Takumi's dark head.

They headed to the lifts and took a lift to the Executive Floor. It was still early; not many people were around. The hostess greeted them and showed them to a secluded table near the window. Bright sunlight poured in through the glass and they both donned designer sunglasses partly because of the brightness, and also because they didn't want to be recognised too easily. They sat down on the plush chairs, facing each other and Takumi began to speak quietly.

"What you're doing; this isn't good for her you know," he said softly. Shin suppressed a derisive snort. _As if you'd know what's good for her,_ he thought. Instead, he lit up a cigarette.

"I'm not planning to let it continue," Shin replied equally blankly. Takumi nodded.

"Good, because it's not going anywhere. If you guys really wanted this to continue, these little meetings wouldn't be happening. You know she's just using you right?" Takumi said bluntly. He took a sip of water that the waitress had given to them. Shin steeled his rage.

"She may be using me but who else does she have left to hold on to?" he asked harshly. Takumi looked at him solidly.

"I can take care of her," he said, but Shin cut him off.

"You can't even take care of Hachi," he ejected, and Takumi felt a tiny little stab. Shin continued venting.

"You promised you'd take care of her, and Satsuki, but all this time, you've been cheating on her haven't you? You've been toying with her and Reira, just because you can't control your own damn feelings!" Shin's voice shook as he uttered his last words. He took a long pull of his cigarette and stubbed it out in the ashtray.

"You disgust me."

He stalked away, leaving nothing behind except the lazily drifting smoke and a bent cigarette. And Takumi, who was thinking hard about his words, because someone had finally struck home.

* * *

Ren was in the same hotel too. He was also awake and smoking and drinking a clear liquid which was most definitely not water, judging from the way he was holding his glass, his heavy hooded blood shot eyes and the fumes emitting from the glass. The sun was climbing to its pinnacle, and the light hit Ren's eyes. He winced, and then pulled sharply at the curtains to shade the room while shielding his eyes from the glare. He traipsed to his bed and fell onto it, facedown. Within five minutes, the doorbell rang, and he groaned aloud into the sheets. The visitor started knocking insistently, and after a few more bangs, Ren pushed himself off the bed and staggered drunkenly to the door, pulling it open roughly.

"WHAT?!" he demanded of the visitor, not even registering who it was as he was rubbing his eyes groggily. Yasu was standing in the corridor, smoking as usual. He raised an eyebrow at Ren's outburst and Ren finally realised who is was and sobered up a little.

"Yasu… Sorry. Been having a bad morning," he said apologetically, and Yasu nodded, taking in the smell of liquor (_shochu_ if he wasn't mistaken, which was Ren's normal drink) and Ren's bedraggled appearance. His hair was sticking up in different directions and his clothes were crumpled; evidently he had slept in them the night before. He walked back into the hotel room, Yasu following behind him. Yasu took in the drawn curtains, the still messy and unmade bed and the bottles of liquor lying around and realised that Ren was taking this badly. However, he had woven his own web.

"Ren," Yasu started, closing the door behind him, "Why are you hiding out here in a hotel room?" Ren sat down in the chair that he had vacated earlier and picked up the glass that he had been drinking from earlier, emptying it.

"You told Nana, haven't you," he said, not answering Yasu's question. Yasu sighed and sat down in the chair opposite Ren's.

"Yes, obviously. You know I don't have a choice. You put me in a very compromising position," Yasu said. Ren put down his glass on the table with a sharp _crack_.

"What position is that, Yas?" he demanded, albeit drunkenly. Yasu observed Ren carefully. He was unusually aggressive.

"You impregnated the lead singer of my band. What do you expect me to do? It's her body, her baby. She has a right to know. Nana came to me for help. She knew something was wrong. She was taking the pill regularly. Nothing like this has ever happened before."

Ren bristled. "There's always a chance," Ren said, but Yasu cut him off.

"A _chance?_ Ren, the truth would've come out eventually. I don't think Nana would've appreciated being told by a doctor that those pills were fake, and having to lead her own little investigation. How could you do this? And still hide here? Go over and explain yourself!" Yasu said, frustrated. And Yasu never really actually got frustrated.

Ren ran his hands through his hair and put his elbows on his knees. It was a position of defeat, despair and hopelessness. Ren clutched his hair harder.

"Ren?" Yasu started again, softly. He was not used to seeing his best friend upset, but these few days he had been. Yasu sighed and leaned forward.

"Go tell her how you feel. Your hiding will benefit no one. Nana will understand, eventually."

Ren shook his head. "No Yasu. She won't- _can't_ forgive me. I've betrayed her. I've taken away what was most important to her. It was selfish. But I- She just- Argh." Yasu shook his head.

"Just go. She just got back from the doctor's. Go see her. She's with Hachi, going home. Go."

* * *

Nana's thought were in a mess. In the past few days, she had discovered she was pregnant, that her husband had given her fake pills so that she would be pregnant, and that her baby was completely healthy. However, the doctor also told her to eat a little more, as she wasn't having enough nourishment. Hachi walked alongside her, arm in arm, chattering away.

"I'm so glad that everything's alright," she confided, and Nana nodded silently. She was thinking about Ren. Hachi bit her lip at Nana's pale, drawn face and pondered about what she should say. She was Nana's Hachi. She was meant to be her happiness, her smiling face, her number one supporter. So she hoisted up her handbag properly on her shoulder and tightened her grip on Nana's arm.

"Come on! Let's go home, and I'll show you what I brought for you, okay?"

Nana nodded, and smiled weakly back at Hachi. She knew that she shouldn't be so grim and dull, because it would worry her best friend. And the last thing her best friend needed right now, was to take care of her _and_ Satsuki. Nana sighed and they got into the car the agency had assigned to her, back to Ren's place.

* * *

_**N.B. **__I have a foreboding feeling that this story is dying :( Reassure me with reviews? _


	17. Chapter XVII: Fishing For Answers

**FISHING FOR ANSWERS**

_**N.B:**__ There's a limit to how much people can procrastinate, and I've reached mine. RELEASING CHAPTER NOW! Hehe. I think that posting up 2 short pieces of drabble have FINALLY stimulated my damn brain. Thanks to __**JacinthX**__, __**Tsunade-kouhai**__, __**Heart of Shadows**__, __**Akane Cross**__, __**emir**__, and __**missgohan**__! Thanks for the support, reassurance and wishes! You guys deserve brownies. And the constructive review from __**Akane Cross**__ is rewarded with Skittles I am eating right now to power myself to write this chapter :)_

* * *

Hachi stuffed the key into the lock and turned it quickly. Nana did not look too good. Possibly the drive back to Ren's place had made her a little sick. Hachi decided to get her lying down as fast as possible someplace which did not move 60 km/h. Preferably, something that did not move at all. Like her bed.

She hustled Nana inside, and closed the door hurriedly behind her.

"Come on Nana, we should get you ins-" Hachi stopped mid-sentence. Nana was standing up straight, finally, and looking at something, no, _someone_, standing in the middle of the apartment. A tall, slim someone, who had appeared to have lost a lot of weight since the few days she had last seen him, judging from his haggard façade and the way his clothes hung off his frame. Ren seemed weary and tired, nervous and also scared. Hachi had never seen Ren even remotely scared before. Or fazed by anything, actually.

She felt the tension crackling in the air, cutting through the silence like a knife. She could almost hear the little bolts of lightning between Ren and Nana. Hachi decided to break it.

"He-hey Ren! I haven't seen you in ages!" she blurted out, plastering on a huge smile. Ren was nearly blinded by her cheerfulness but nodded complacently. However, he still never took his eyes off Nana, who, at Hachi's outburst, started staring at the floor. Hachi took this in, then laughed brokenly to fill the silence which was supposed to have been filled with Ren's answer. Hachi had a sudden inspiration, and saved herself from the situation with a

"Oh yeah, I brought something for you guys! I'll go get it in the kitchen."

And off she scurried. Then she peeked out slyly while also carefully unwrapping the strawberry cake she had made for Nana. Ren seemed to have started a conversation.

"Nana," he began awkwardly, fidgeting. Then he changed tact. "How are you now?" he asked, seriously. Nana didn't move. Ren took a tentative step towards her.

"Nana?"

Her head snapped up immediately, and her eyes were filled, brimming, spilling over, with tears. Ren recoiled; taken aback, shocked and disgusted at himself.

_I made her cry I made her cry._

Nana was openly sobbing, tears running down a mile a minute, splashing onto the white tiled floor. Her sobs racked her body back and forth, echoing in the apartment. Hachi heard them and hurried to comfort Nana but Ren got there first. He pulled her into his arms and held her head to her chest.

"I'm, I'm sorry, Nana! I… I don't want you to leave. You _can't_ leave…" he said, trailing off, putting his lips to her hair. Nana remained silent, except for the sniffs and coughs and the choking back of more sobs and tears.

"I can't… I don't think I can bear it alone. If you leave… How can I deal with it? I won't be able to do it alone," Ren said. Nana's eyes were squeezed shut tightly. Squeezing out the last of the tears. Her hands were fists, grabbing onto Ren's shirt so tight it was crumpled like paper. She coughed one last cough, and then raised her head finally to meet Ren's eyes. She saw how he was: tired, troubled and scared. Ren never used to be scared. Nana knew exactly what he was scared of. And she understood. She didn't get angry, or yell or cry anymore. She saw what Ren was saying. And she nodded. Then she spoke.

"O-Okay."

That one word set Ren free. He smiled sadly, and hugged her close.

"Thank you," he murmured into her hair. "I love you." Nana nodded, feeling a slight dampness in her hair. She exhaled and breathed in a scent she had lived with for two years, lost for one, then regained for seven. She would never forget how Ren smelt. And she also didn't want to ever lose it again.

Inside the kitchen, Hachi breathed a quiet sigh of relief. She had heard their conversation, and Nana's quiet and tame reply. She wondered vaguely what Ren was talking about, and then resolved to question Nobu the minute she got home. She straightened her clothes, picked up the cake and then walked out cheerily.

"So, who wants cake?"

* * *

Nobu was playing Go Fish with Satsuki. And he was losing.

"Gooo… FISH!" Satsuki squealed happily and laughed as Nobu clutched his face and his pile of cards. Then he brightened and tossed down a pair.

"HA! Pair queens haha!" Nobu exclaimed to Satsuki. She smiled back at him, and then waved her remaining five cards in front of him.

"I'm going to wiiin," she sang tauntingly. "I want a… Seven with that spade thing." Nobu grudgingly handed the card over as the key turned in the lock and Hachi burst into the house.

"NOBUUUU!" she exclaimed, causing him to drop a few of his cards. Satsuki memorized the ones she had seen in delight as he tried to cover them.

"Yes?" Nobu said, while trying to recover the cards on the floor without dropping all the ones in his hand. He shooed Satsuki away.

"WHAT DID REN DO?" Hachi said, dumping everything on the sofa and jumping onto it herself, nearly upsetting her daughter. Satsuki bounced back to a sitting position indignantly. Then looked at Nobu questioningly too. Nobu gulped and arranged his cards absent mindedly while looking from one to the other.

"What?" he asked back. "What do you mean?" Nobu put on his best innocent face. Hachi rolled her eyes and looked deadpan at Nobu.

"Stop lying. I can tell," she said, and Nobu laughed awkwardly.

"Hahaha… I have no idea what you are talking about!"

"Why do you sound weird?" Satsuki asked Nobu. He sighed and then gave Hachi a look that said _I'll tell you later, not in front of her_. Hachi nodded and then ushered Satsuki to wash up.

"It's dinner time!"

* * *

Later in the confines of their bedroom and with the curious little Satsuki tucked safely away in her bed in her bedroom, Hachi pounced on Nobu to Give. It. Up.

"Okay! Stop hitting me!" Nobu said, cowering under Hachi's death glare and repeated admonishing of pillow blows. He straightened up and looked down at his hands, fidgeting. Hachi put down the pillow and observed him. It wasn't easy for Nobu to keep a secret, she knew. And when he did, it was when it really mattered. More often than not, it was serious. So Hachi stopped playing around and faced Nobu seriously.

"What Ren did… Not a lot of people know, do they?" she said softly, and Nobu nodded in reply.

"It… It wasn't his fault. What happened. He didn't get it by himself or anything," Nobu stammered. "It's all that stupid guy's fault," he suddenly spat out. Hachi stayed silent and watching. Then she asked finally.

"What did he do?"

Nobu looked up at her. Then he looked down at his hands again.

"Ren was on cocaine. He was taking it one day in the bathroom, and he passed out. Only Takumi found him, and he dealt with it quickly, and told nobody else. Anyone who helped him had to keep it a secret. But when Nana found out, she made him quit. It wasn't easy, and that's why, all those years ago… That happened."

Nobu stopped. Hachi digested what he just said, and then nodded.

"So that's why. That scandal nearly ruined everything. So that's how it happened."

* * *

_**N.B:**__ I honestly don't know if this story even makes sense anymore T.T But I want to keep it true to following the plot of the original manga, so therefore there are some similar elements. Gah, does this make sense? It doesn't seem to at 4 in the morning._


	18. Chapter XVIII: A Thousand Words

_**A/N:**__ Yes, I'm back! For now. It's been a long time and many things have happened. I'm in Australia now, continuing my studies. And here's an update because there __**are**__ still people reading this. Even if it has been dead for a year or more. Thanks to __**JacinthX**__, __**Beth**__, __**Pocky-chan!**__, __**Rose Petal Princess**__, __**angelic_blossom**__, __**genki laruku fan**__, __**katryoma**__, __**monkey kix ass**__ and __**Ydera**__ for the reviews!  
_

* * *

"This is **not** good for publicity," Mr. Kawano said, pacing worriedly around the board room. His forehead furrowed in concern and agitation.

"Do you know how badly the public will react once they hear the news?" he asked Yasu, who was sitting motionless at the table, smoke curling up around tapped his ash into the tray in response. Mr. Kawano sighed and regained his seat opposite Yasu.

"Yasu. You realize this will not go down well, do you not?" he said, trying to peer past the dark sunglasses into Yasu's eyes.

"Mr. Kawano, with all due respect, it seems that we have no choice," Yasu replied, stubbing his light out. "What's done is done."

* * *

Nana yelled in shock as the cold liquid touched her pale, bare skin. "That is FREAKING COLD!" she yelled, grabbing Hachi's arm. Nana K. sighed wearily.

"Nana, it's just the gel they need to put on so they can use the ultrasound," she said patiently, patting Nana's head comfortingly. The ultrasound technician smiled at her understandingly, and proceeded to spread the gel over Nana's abdomen.

"Can't they heat it up or something beforehand?" Nana said crankily, flicking the patch on her arm. Hachi sighed once again and grabbed hold of her fingers to stop her fidgeting.

"Stop that Nana," she ordered. "Look at your baby."

The black and white image of a tiny embryo was now on the screen. All around, they could hear the _thud thud thud_ of the baby's heartbeat. Hachi exhaled in happiness, looking at the healthy baby on the screen.

"Look at that," she breathed.

Nana complied, watching the little person wave at them on the screen.

"These are the hands… The feet… His head…" the ultrasound technician pointed out helpfully. Nana started.

"It's a BOY?" she asked, surprised. "You can tell already?"

The ultrasound technician blushed and said, "Well technically, we can't be too sure, but he does seem to have a little… Umm… Err…"

"Wee wee?" Hachi supplied helpfully. Nana snorted in amusement.

"A girl would be better," she said snottily, but there was tenderness in her eyes as she surveyed the little baby waving goodbye before the image vanished from the screen. The ultrasound technician lithely wiped off the liquid from Nana's abdomen and pulled her shirt back into place.

"There, all done," she said cheerily, and Nana and Hachi thanked her.

"By the way, you wouldn't happen to have recorded the video, did you?" Hachi asked. The ultrasound technician looked up and nodded.

"We keep recordings of all our patients; should I burn it to a CD for you?"

"That would be nice," said Hachi. The technician trotted to the back. Nana sat up and eyed Hachi.

"Why do you want it?" she asked, straightening her clothes. Hachi stared back in surprise.

"You didn't think of showing it to Ren?" Hachi replied, handing Nana her leather jacket. Nana's eyes widened as she remembered her husband.

"No, actually. I didn't at all," she said as she pulled on her jacket and took out a pair of sunglasses.

"Thanks Hachi."

* * *

Takumi was distracted. His thoughts were not on the current state his band was in, or on what he should be doing to increase their popularity. Instead, it was on his soon-to-be-ex-wife, and the divorce papers that sat in front of him.

The line above her name, _Nana Komatsu_, was signed and dated in her handwriting. His, _Takumi Ichinose_, was left blank and white. All ready for his overused John Hancock and today's date. A pen was sitting just beside his hand, waiting to be used. Takumi's hands turned into hard fists and he shoved the papers and the pen away angrily, causing them to fly in every direction like falling leaves.

He stood up, breathing hard, then looked at the papers fluttering around and sighed. He picked them up one by one. Arranged them back the way they came and then picked up the pen.

* * *

Reira pressed the green button.

Waited.

Tapped her foot patiently.

Then pressed it again when there was no answer.

Redial. Waiting. Foot tapping quickens.

Patience running out after the fifth time she was trying again.

Why was Shin not answering?

* * *

Shin sat in the bright sunlight, eyes protected by his eyewear, trying to help Satsuki with her homework. Nobu sat opposite the two, keeping an eye on them and an eye everywhere else, hoping that the mosquitoes (read: paparazzi) wouldn't turn up suddenly and blind them all with their camera flashes. He was wearing a hat to cover his obvious blond locks and the sunglasses as usual. Sunglasses were a daily thing for all of them now. He sipped his latte and immediately straightened when he caught sight of two women making their way towards their table.

Nobu immediately moved his chair to make space for the two of them, standing up to help the one with light brown hair with her bags. Satsuki jumped up and abandoned her homework at the sight of her mother and godmother, squealing in delight. They hurriedly shushed her, worried about the amount of attention that they were drawing to themselves.

It was midday, so not many people were around to witness their little gathering in that small coffee shop except for the sleepy waitress and cashier who were chatting inside. They chattered and laughed loudly, happy to be free of hiding and never being able to relax, so they enjoyed the little time they had to be themselves outside.

Shin checked his phone to find 20 missed calls from Layla. He looked at his band mates and his surrogate mother, all laughing and teasing the little girl who was his "sister". They were not paying him much attention. He quietly tapped out a message under the table. He pressed 'send', and rejoined the group; laughing and smiling.

"Hey guys," Yasu said, appearing from thin air and startling everyone. He picked up Satsuki and placed her on his lap and sat down on his stolen seat. "What's up?"

A sudden flash made them all stop mid laugh though Hachi's story on how Nana yelled at the coldness of the ultrasound gel, and made them all quickly alert and wary. They all looked around for the source of the flash. The cameraman was standing less than a foot away, and all the guys at the table half stood when he revealed himself to be Ginpei.

"You guys all looked so happy, so I snapped a picture," he said, and they sighed in relief.

"You scared us senseless Ginpei," Nobu said, and he chuckled.

"Aren't you all used to it by now?" he retorted. "Besides, it's one of the few pictures in which you guys have as a group, where you're all happy."

And he was right.


End file.
